Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is often argued that businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. This essay will evaluate why this is happening and then evaluate if this is a positive or negative development.
There are several reasons why company owners emphasies newness. Firstly, people attract towards new stuff, because they contend if something is launched new it is going to a better quality. For example, smart phone company launched new version model every year and citizens buy them. Secondly, the intense competition between the companies is the sole reason market emphasises on latest model. They do not want to left behind. Although the citizens major focus is quality not the quantity the companies are selling.
Other than that, whether it is positive or negative I highly believe it is a negative trend, because it leads to more consumption and waste the perfectly fine model. Moreover, the continous changing in technology regardless of their benefit the public forced to buy new stuff and leave the perfectly fine products, because of two reasons.
First and foremost is that, they believe if the newest model is launched it should provide better quality. Next is societal pressue that individuals facing, if they want to fit into the socity they need to purchase thing. For example, the launch of iphone 18 make people got mad about it.
In conclusion, it is highly motivated for the companies not to make new products just for the sake of profit and marketing, that could leads toward global crisi.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The student addresses all parts of the task by discussing both why businesses emphasise newness and giving a clear opinion that this is a negative development. The position is maintained throughout the essay. However, some ideas are under-developed and lack sufficient extension. For instance, the reasons given in body paragraphs, such as 'intense competition' or 'societal pressure', are introduced but not fully explained with deep analysis. Examples like 'smart phone company launched new version model every year' and 'iphone 18' support the main points, but remain slightly basic. Overall, the response fulfills the requirements of Band 6 by addressing the prompt and presenting a clear position, though development and support could be more thorough to reach a higher band.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction and conclusion. Paragraphing is attempted, though the body of the essay contains some structural confusion, with paragraphs being somewhat disjointed. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'Other than that', but their application is sometimes mechanical or inaccurate, as seen with 'Other than that' or 'First and foremost is that'. Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as pronoun use referring to vague antecedents like 'regardless of their benefit the public forced'. Progression is visible, but the flow between sentences and ideas is frequently disrupted by awkward transitions, placing this response firmly in Band 5.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The student attempts a range of vocabulary appropriate for the topic, including words like 'consumption', 'competition', and 'development'. However, there are numerous errors in word choice, form, and collocation throughout the text. Examples include 'people attract towards new stuff' (passive voice needed), 'contend if something is launched new it is going to a better quality', 'continous changing' (continuous change), and 'societal pressue that individuals facing'. Furthermore, spelling errors such as 'pressue' and 'crisi' occur. These vocabulary and spelling inaccuracies are noticeable and occasionally cause some difficulty for the reader, matching the profile for Band 5.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating subordinating clauses such as 'whether it is positive or negative I highly believe it is a negative trend'. However, attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty, leading to grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Examples of grammatical errors include 'people attract towards new stuff', 'if something is launched new it is going to a better quality', 'the public forced to buy', and 'that could leads toward global crisi'. Frequent errors in verb forms, missing auxiliary verbs, and prepositions are present throughout the essay. Because these errors can occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, a Band 5 score is appropriate.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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