Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-26
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
In this contemporary era , most of the businessman promote their product as new in few forms.According to my prospective this is positive development and now i will discuss my positive points as well as why is this happen in subsequent paragraph.
There could be various resons to emphasis their product as a new in few ways but the first and foremost reson is that most of the comapny ower may wanr to increse thier customer. To illustrate it, in thesedays mostly individuals want to get something new which can help their daily routine . Secondly,they want to increase the demand of thier item. To explain it, most of the people buy product to see as new and after analyze thsi company try to promote their items as a new. As a result , tehy can get best improvement in thier buisness.
There are the positive point about teh given statement. Firstly, by promoting as a new the company owner can get best profit.To explain it, its may look attractive when individuals buy products to see as a new on packing and tehy by more products .So, the copany an sell easily their more products.Lastly,prople can get new inventions in markets . To elaborate it,as the company owner want to sell new products then they put more efforts to invent thier products with new features.So, people can live easy life with new feature gagets.
To conclude it,increase demand and increase customer are the main reasons on the other hand individuals can get new items and company manager can get good profite are major positive development which i mention in paragraphs.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt, discussing why businesses emphasise new products and giving a clear opinion that this is a positive development. Ideas are present, such as increasing customer demand and driving innovation, but they remain quite repetitive and under-developed. For instance, the notion that people want new things for their daily routine is stated rather than thoroughly extended. While the writer's position is clear throughout, the lack of depth and recurrent generalisations place this response squarely in the band 5 territory.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, which helps establish a basic structure. However, logical progression is frequently hampered by repetitive phrasing and a lack of clear cohesive links between sentences. Devices like 'To illustrate it' and 'To explain it' are used mechanically and often inaccurately to introduce repetitive assertions rather than genuine examples or explanations. Referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the concluding paragraph where the summary is overly formulaic and difficult to follow. Consequently, the organization meets the criteria for band 5.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.0
The vocabulary is very basic and repetitive throughout the essay. The student repeatedly relies on rudimentary words and phrases like 'businessman', 'product', 'new', 'company owner', and 'profite'. There are numerous word choice and spelling errors, such as 'resons', 'comapny', 'ower', 'thesedays', 'tehy', 'buisness', 'teh', and 'prople'. While the meaning can generally be extracted, the range is limited and inadequate for more advanced discussion, reflecting a band 4 performance in lexical resource.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0
The essay displays a very limited range of grammatical structures. Simple sentences dominate, and attempts at complex or compound structures are consistently marred by frequent errors, missing articles, incorrect subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'most of the businessman promote', 'comapny ower may wanr'), and punctuation mistakes. Errors are pervasive and frequently strain the reader, meaning control of grammar is weak. This level of accuracy and range aligns with band 4 descriptors.
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