Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-09-29
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In many country of the world, today many businesses are emphasis that their items are new in some with the help of ads. Although some might consider it negative, I believe it to be extremely beneficial. Not only because details about the product and better quality, but also because of sales increased.
There are multiple advantages associated with advertising the product. Firstly, details about the product can be considered as the leading benefit of this development. As the company give informant about their items in ads. Take an example, the companies of Japan, attract the people attention by giving the details of their product in advertisement. Thus, this mega benefit I believe has the potential to make this development a positive development.
Secondly, apart from details about the product, better quality can also be another major benefit. As companies show detail of product in ads their also provide a good quality product. Hence, a survey conduct in China, 70 percent people said companies provide a better quality product if their give advertisement of their product. Hence, better quality can labelled as the most significant advantage, giving this development a positive development.
Finally, sales increased can also be considered a leading benefit of businesses advertisement. As more and more people know about the product.
To sum up, even though advertising their product might have some drawback too, but I believe that the benefit it brings in terms of details about the product, better quality and sales increased can make this development an overall positive one.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response addresses both parts of the task by discussing why businesses emphasise newness in advertising and giving an opinion on whether this is positive or negative. The position is clear throughout, supporting the development as beneficial. However, the ideas are relatively repetitive and lack deep extension. For instance, the reasons given (details about the product, better quality, and increased sales) are introduced in the introduction and then restated in body paragraphs without substantial elaboration or depth. Examples provided, such as 'companies of Japan' or a 'survey conduct in China', are very general and unsubstantiated. This places the performance firmly in the Band 5 category, as the ideas remain somewhat limited and under-developed, relying heavily on repetition rather than progressive elaboration.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay has a recognisable structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, and paragraphing is used. However, the overall progression is heavily impaired by repetitive phrasing and a mechanical use of cohesive devices. Words like 'Firstly', 'Secondly', 'Finally', and 'Hence' are overused and often misuse-placed grammatically. For instance, 'Hence, a survey conduct in China, 70 percent people said...' shows faulty syntactic integration of cohesive elements. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the fourth body paragraph is a single fragmented sentence: 'Finally, sales increased can also be considered a leading benefit of businesses advertisement. As more and more people know about the product.' This lack of complete sentence development and clumsy logical sequencing aligns with Band 5 descriptors.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary is very basic and repetitive, frequently reusing the exact same phrases such as 'details about the product' and 'better quality' across multiple paragraphs. There are noticeable word choice and morphological errors, such as 'In many country', 'businesses are emphasis', 'informant' instead of information, and 'sales increased' instead of increased sales. Attempts at less common vocabulary are minimal, and the restricted range forces the writer to repeat simple terms constantly. Because these errors and the limited range cause noticeable strain and difficulty for the reader, the response meets the criteria for Band 4.5, rounded to 5.0 based on minimal adequacy.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writing contains a very limited range of grammatical structures, and attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty. There are persistent, major grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('companies give informant', 'survey conduct', 'businesses advertisement'), fragmented sentences ('As more and more people know about the product'), and incorrect word forms ('businesses are emphasis'). Punctuation is also problematic, with improper full stops used before dependent clauses ('As the company give informant...'). Because errors are frequent, occur in almost every sentence, and occasionally cause difficulty for the reader in grasping the precise intended meaning, this falls into the Band 4 to 5 range, best represented by a 4.5 rounded to 5.0 for communicative intent.
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