Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In some of the advertisements, business owners nowadays usually draw attention to their products as they are new in some way. In my opinion, it could be a negative development as it is an indication towards a fraud or scam.
Nowadays, every other person wants to earn money for the financial stability. Many businesses including cosmetics, beauty and even grocery stores usually sell their products by emphasizing that their items and products are new. For example, many grocery store owners deceive their clients by changing the expiry dates on the items. This might be because they priorities selling the expired products instead of wasting them. As a result, people get attracted by the advertisements and get interested in purchasing a specific product. Most of the citizens get scammed by purchasing online items without any investigation or reviews. For instance, advertisements could fascinate young adults in a several ways, which might result in them buying the things they see online.
In my opinion, it is a negative development as it could have many drawbacks. For instance, if a beauty product is sold by claiming that it is new, it could be harmful for skin and can cause damage. Therefore, marketing techniques should be in an appropriate way within ethical boundaries. Another drawback is that people might lose their trust in local products and, as a result, become reluctant to buy anything from their own country.
In conclusion, advertisements should be accurate and provide reliable information of the product being sold so that people do not get scammed.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt regarding the emphasis on new products and whether this is a positive or negative development, but the treatment remains somewhat limited. The position that it is a negative development is stated, but the ideas supporting it tend to drift into a discussion of fraud and expired items rather than focusing directly on the marketing strategy of novelty itself. Consequently, the ideas are under-developed, particularly when explaining the broader implications of novelty advertising. The example about grocery stores changing expiry dates relates more to general retail malpractice than the specific phenomenon of emphasising 'newness' in advertising. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to explore the prompt's core themes more fully and provide more direct, well-extended support for their stance.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a discernible introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes mechanical or repetitive, particularly in the way body paragraphs are introduced and linked. While basic cohesive devices such as 'For example' and 'For instance' are used to signal examples, their overuse without varied transitional phrases restricts the flow. Paragraphing is attempted, but grouping all ideas about scams and health risks into dense blocks limits clarity. Improving the logical progression between sentences and diversifying cohesive markers would help establish a clearer sense of direction throughout the response.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is minimally adequate for the task, providing enough range to convey the basic argument, but it lacks precision and flexibility. There are noticeable word choice issues and awkward phrasings, such as 'indication towards a fraud or scam' and 'priorities selling' instead of 'prioritize selling'. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary like 'investigation', 'fascinate', and 'ethical boundaries', but occasional inaccuracies in collocation and word form appear throughout the text. To achieve a higher score, the vocabulary needs to be more precise, natural, and varied, moving beyond repetitive structures to express ideas with greater nuance and stylistic awareness.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0
The writer demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, successfully constructing multi-clause sentences such as 'if a beauty product is sold by claiming that it is new, it could be harmful for skin and can cause damage.' There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, including articles and prepositions, such as 'in a several ways' and 'information of the product' instead of 'information about the product'. However, these errors are sporadic and rarely impede overall communication. The punctuation is generally handled well, and the sentence structures provide enough variety to showcase a reasonable command of basic and moderately complex grammar.
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