Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Nowadays, many companies represent their products in advertisement more attractively and tries to show that their products are something unique and new from others. The aforementioned change is an undesirable change because it can allow poeople to take wrong decision and sometimes it can create a negative image of company.
To begin with why the matter in concern is unwelcomed, unique features can attract peoples' mind and convince them to buy that product. To explain it, many businesses nowadays shows attractive visuals, sound effects and extra features to persuade customers to buy their products. Additionally, they shows the comparison with other products and tries to show that their products are the best and have some extra features. People generally get convinced by these kind of advertisement and buy that products without considering their need, financial situation and customer reviews. To give an example, according to a report by BBC news it is found that due to showing extra benefits of product in advertisements, people usually buys unnecessory things.
Additionally, another drawback is that sometime wrong informative advertisement creates negative image of company among people. People usually shares the information about new products with their friends and family members. People usually avoids to by products from that company who compares themself with others and this can declined their sale and create negative image of business. To quote an instance, according to a survey of Oxford University, it is found that those companies who compares their products with others and shows that their products are new, have lower sales revenue.
To conclude, this essay has shown how the adveretising about some product is unique is an unfavourable one because it persuade people to buy things which are not according to their need and it can create an infame image of company by showing comparison.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing why businesses emphasise new products and stating a position that this is a negative development. However, the ideas remain somewhat limited and under-developed. For example, while the writer mentions that advertisements lead people to make wrong decisions, the supporting arguments rely on generalisations rather than deep exploration. The explanation regarding company image and comparisons with competitors lacks specific, fully realised examples, relying instead on vague assertions about surveys. To reach a higher standard, the ideas need to be more fully extended and supported with clearer reasoning and more convincing elaboration.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response maintains a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical structure. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, body paragraphs addressing different aspects of the negative development, and a conclusion. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Additionally', and 'To conclude' are employed to signpost the structure, but referencing and transitions between sentences can feel repetitive. For instance, the phrase 'People usually' is overused to introduce new points in consecutive sentences within the second body paragraph. Improving the variety of cohesive ties and ensuring smoother transitions between ideas would enhance the overall flow.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate for the task, providing enough range to communicate the main points. There are noticeable lexical errors throughout the text, such as 'poeople', 'unwelcomed', 'infame image', and 'adveretising', alongside awkward word choices like 'unnecessory things'. Furthermore, the student attempts less common vocabulary, such as 'unfavourable' and 'revenue', but these attempts are accompanied by inaccuracies in spelling, word form, and collocation. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they cause occasional difficulty for the reader. Expanding word choice precision and eliminating spelling mistakes are essential for progression.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writing demonstrates a limited range of structures, relying mostly on simple sentences alongside some attempts at complex forms. However, attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty. There are persistent errors in subject-verb agreement and pluralisation, such as 'many companies... tries', 'businesses... shows', 'these kind of advertisement', and 'companies who compares'. Additionally, issues with article usage and prepositions are evident throughout the essay. While the reader can generally deduce the writer's meaning, frequent grammatical errors cause strain and place the writing firmly within the lower descriptive category. Incorporating a wider variety of error-free complex structures is necessary to improve.
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