Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It has been observed that, in their promotional contents, businesses recently usually pay attention that their products are new in some way. In my perception, this is outrightly advantageous to sale the products. In my perception, this is detrimental to a large extent for cutomers who spend his money. My preference is justified in upcoming paragraphs with valid reasons and examples.

The fundamental reason for my inclination is that, business growing very well through the advertisement because it is attract the people and creates pressure on cutomers to purchase them. For example, a customer seeing an advertisement on TV at home and the displayed items on ad is attractive which means that customer but it. Moreover, they can compete with other businesses like someone who runs the business since a long years which means new business can't beat them but using of advertisement they also had chance to beat them and overtaking. As a result, small business could grow rapidly in this competition era.

Furthermore, sometime small shops sale more than other and customer create a crowd or rush in the shop so they can make an advertisement of product so customer can take his product information is the best way to maintain crowd. To add to this, some business make advertisement for an item that is not for sale and they are sale through the promotional contents.

In the contrary, The downsides should not be overlooked. To begin with, Businesses may make people believe that their existing products are outdated simply because a newer version is available. For instance, a company launches a new smartphone every year even though the previous model still works well. As a result, people spend money unnecessarily.

In conclusion, businesses emphasise the new features of their products mainly to attract customers and remain competitive in the market. I believe this is a positive development because it encourages companies to innovate and gives consumers more choices.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both questions: you suggest that businesses highlight novelty to attract customers and compete, and you give a view about whether this is positive or negative. However, your position is inconsistent. The introduction calls the practice “outrightly advantageous” but then says it is “detrimental,” while the conclusion clearly supports a positive view. This makes your overall response difficult to follow. Several points are relevant, such as pressure to buy and the example of smartphones, but the explanation of why novelty is emphasised is limited, and the discussion of small shops and products “not for sale” is unclear. Develop fewer ideas with specific explanations and examples, and state one consistent position. The response meets the required length.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is some paragraphing, and the response broadly moves from reasons to a drawback and then a conclusion. However, progression is weakened by the conflicting position in the introduction and conclusion, and the first two body paragraphs do not clearly distinguish or develop their main points. Linking phrases such as “Moreover,” “Furthermore,” and “To add to this” are used, but they sometimes connect ideas without showing a clear logical relationship. The phrase “In the contrary” also introduces the opposing point awkwardly. Make each paragraph focus on one central idea, explain it in a clear sequence, and use transitions that accurately signal contrast or addition. Clearer referencing would also help readers understand who “they” and “his” refer to.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-related vocabulary, including “advertisement,” “outdated,” “newer version,” and “competitive,” which helps communicate the topic. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are noticeably inaccurate, sometimes making meaning unclear. For example, “promotional contents” is not a natural way to describe advertising, “pay attention that” does not express the intended idea, and “sale the products” is repeated where a more accurate verb is needed. There are also spelling errors such as “cutomers.” Aim to use precise, natural phrases for advertising and consumer behaviour, and check spelling and word forms. Replacing repeated general terms with accurate alternatives will make your argument easier to understand.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “because,” “which means,” and “even though,” but control is inconsistent. Frequent errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction can make the reader work to understand your meaning. For example, “business growing very well” lacks a correctly formed verb, and “it is attract the people” has an incorrect verb pattern. In “a customer … the displayed items … is attractive,” the subject and verb do not agree, while “customer but it” appears to contain a sentence-level construction error. Capitalisation is also inconsistent, as in “In the contrary, The downsides.” Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then add subordinate clauses and check each sentence’s subject, verb, and punctuation.

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