Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Advertisement play very crucial role in selling a product because it attracts consumers. In this era, advertisement are design by businesses in such a way that there products are different from all other existing products. This essay will discuss the reason for this trend and why i believe this is a negative development.

One of the main reasons why businessmen use this advertising techniques is to grow their businesses. They want to attract a large number of audience. For example , younger audience buy these products for themselves through the ads available. In addition, they also earn sufficient income. Their is strong competition in the market and everyone has the same product but it's packaging and advertisement are different. If a businessman spent money on advertisement and make it unique from different so it must be more usable than the others.

I believe that the growing popularity of this ads is a negative development because it often waste money and cause frustation . Every time when individuals buy something by the advertisement they are not same as the advertised product. Consequently, it breaks people trust. Furthermore, this advertisement has a negative impact on children because they are more attracted towards it. Children has a very sensitive skin and when they apply the advertised beauty products. So, they damage their skin and a causes serious problems. Moreover, teenagers start focus on this things instead of their studies. They are also spreading false and wrong information.

In conclusion, businessmen use advertisement techniques to grow and to promote their business. I think it is a negative because sometimes they are targeting children and also spreading wrong information which broke people trust.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both parts of the question: you suggest that businesses highlight novelty to attract customers and grow, and you clearly state that you see this as negative. The points about competition, misleading advertising, and effects on children are relevant. However, the explanation of why products are presented as new remains general, and the example about younger consumers is not developed enough to show how novelty itself influences their choices. The claims about beauty products damaging children’s skin and advertising spreading false information also need clearer support or a more specific example. To strengthen the response, explain the business motive more precisely—for instance, how novelty differentiates a product in a crowded market—and develop each supporting point with a clear cause-and-effect explanation. Your position is present, but some ideas remain limited or unclear.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph explaining businesses’ motives, a paragraph presenting your negative view, and a conclusion that restates your position. Linking expressions such as “In addition,” “Furthermore,” and “Consequently” help signal relationships between ideas. However, progression within the body paragraphs is sometimes uneven. The first body paragraph moves from attracting an audience to income, competition, and product usefulness without fully connecting these points. In the second, the discussion shifts from trust to children’s skin and then teenagers’ studies, so the central argument becomes less focused. Some references, such as “this” in “this things,” are unclear. Group related points and use clearer references and transitions to make the argument flow more naturally.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a range of relevant topic vocabulary, including “consumers,” “competition,” “advertisement,” “sensitive skin,” and “false information,” so the main ideas can generally be understood. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or repetitive. For example, “a large number of audience” is not a natural expression, “growing popularity of this ads” is awkward, and “more usable than the others” does not clearly express the intended comparison. Spelling errors such as “frustation” also reduce accuracy. Aim to use more precise phrases for the business strategy and its effects, and check spelling and natural word combinations. Replacing repeated uses of “advertisement” with suitable alternatives can also improve variety.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a reason clause in “because it often waste money” and a conditional structure beginning “If a businessman spent money.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in agreement, articles, and verb forms occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. Examples include “Advertisement play,” “advertisement are design,” “Their is strong competition,” and “Children has.” The sentence beginning “When they apply the advertised beauty products” is incomplete, while “it breaks people trust” has an unclear grammatical reference. Work on matching subjects and verbs, forming complete clauses, and checking articles and possessives. Shorter, accurately controlled sentences would make your meaning clearer before you add more complex structures.

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