Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In advertising, businesses nowadays focuses that their products are new in some way so that more people are attracted and buy that product.

This is done to have a huge range of customers. So that they will get a wide range of customers buying product and giving its feedback. In my opinion, it is a positive development strategy to engage people.

Once I started a business and my product was hair oil. I also made a strategy involving essential features of that product so that i could justify my product i.e. hair oil is organic, it is ammonia free, it contains a huge range of naturals seed oils that helps hair strengthening, long and shiny hairs. I advertised my product on different pages of social media. I created various posts with my product picture with key features. I decided the name of my product as Calamus Hairoil. I tried my best to make its labels and bottle different and convenient. The packaging was entirely different as the bottle is in the box and then it is again packed in a bubble sheet. Again my focus was to make it eye catching. I also created a website for easy online orders. I contacted the most popular delivery service i.e. postex. So that my customers do not face any problem regarding delivery.

At the end, I will again agree with the positive development for emphasizing the advertisement of the new product.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You give a clear opinion that emphasising new features is positive, and your hair-oil business provides a relevant personal example. However, the explanation of why businesses highlight novelty is brief: you say it attracts customers and brings feedback, but do not explain the appeal of innovation or how it can influence purchasing decisions. The example then focuses mainly on your product’s ingredients, packaging, social-media posts and delivery arrangements, rather than showing how its newness benefited customers. The conclusion repeats your view without adding support. The response is also 231 words, 19 words below the required minimum; the eight words copied from the prompt are excluded. Develop the reasons and connect the example more directly to the question.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic overall sequence: you introduce the strategy and your opinion, give a personal example, and finish with a conclusion. This helps the reader follow the broad direction. However, the response is presented as one long paragraph, so the main reason, example and conclusion are not clearly separated. Some links are mechanical or incomplete, such as the sentence fragment “So that they will get a wide range of customers” and the repeated use of “So that” and “Again.” The many details about packaging and delivery also interrupt the progression from the question’s general issue to your supporting example. Use distinct paragraphs and clearer links that show how each detail supports your argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

Your vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the topic, with relevant terms such as “essential features,” “organic,” “eye catching,” “packaging” and “online orders.” The product example also gives you opportunities to use topic-specific language. However, the range is limited and several phrases are repetitive or imprecise, including “wide range of customers,” “different” and “positive development.” Some combinations are unnatural, such as “a huge range of naturals seed oils” and “hair strengthening, long and shiny hairs,” which make parts of the description less clear. Aim for more precise wording and natural collocations, especially when explaining why novelty attracts buyers. Check word forms and spelling as well, for example “natural” rather than “naturals.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences and use clauses to explain purpose, as in “I created various posts with my product picture with key features.” However, the response relies heavily on simple sentence patterns, and several grammatical errors recur. The opening has subject–verb disagreement: “businesses nowadays focuses” should be “businesses nowadays focus.” “So that they will get…” is a sentence fragment, while “I also made a strategy involving essential features … so that i could justify my product” is awkwardly constructed. There are also errors in articles, plurals and agreement, such as “buying product” and “seed oils that helps.” Capitalise “I,” and practise combining ideas into complete, controlled sentences with accurate agreement and punctuation.

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