Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Businesses nowadays in their advertising usually emphasise that their prouducts are new in some way.

In my opinion it is a postive development. Because to increase your business, it is necessary to introduce some new features to your products. Now people do mostly shopping and buy things online or by seeing the advertisement. Their are many companies that sales the same products in the market. So, to boost your sale you have to introduce some new features to products which caught the attention of buiers. So, to inform the public about that your product is somewhat new in some aspects than others, advertisement is a best away. Here I want to add my own example. A few months ago I want to buy a voltage meter. So, I start searching about this their were many ads about voltage meters. I was in search of best voltage meter. Than I saw an ad in which they said taht their voltage meter also shows ampares. So, both voltage and amapre can be done throug one device. This feature attrack me to buy that device. They also claim that their many other products are different htan others that availabe in market in many aspects. So, now I become their regular custmor. whenever, I need an electronic product I buy from them.

Businessmen are very clever they know how they can increase their sales and can get attention of large audience. There are many electronic shops in my home town but one is buiest because they said that their products are different from others such as they have freezers on which you can adjust temperature through a mobile app. As well as a digital meter is fix on it which shows the temperature of the freezer. This feature attrack the young people most.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You answer both parts of the question: you explain that businesses highlight new features to attract buyers and increase sales, and you clearly state that you see this as positive. The voltage-meter example supports this reasoning, while the freezer example shows how a distinctive feature can appeal to customers. However, the explanation of why this advertising is common is stronger than the discussion of whether it is positive. The benefits are illustrated, but you could develop them further—for example, by explaining how innovation helps consumers compare products or encourages companies to improve quality. A brief acknowledgement of possible drawbacks would also make your evaluation more considered.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an identifiable progression from your opinion and general explanation to two examples, so the reader can follow the main line of thought. However, the ideas are crowded into long blocks rather than clearly organised paragraphs, and the second example is introduced without a strong link to the first. Connectors such as “So” recur frequently, while “Here I want to add my own example” and “As well as” do not create smooth transitions. Use separate paragraphs for your position, reasons and examples, and make the relationship between each example and your argument explicit. Clearer referencing would also help readers track which company or product you mean.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “advertisement,” “features,” “attention,” “regular customer” and “audience,” and the examples make your meaning generally understandable. However, the range is limited by repeated words such as “products,” “different” and “feature,” and several choices or spellings are inaccurate, including “sales” for “sells,” “busiest” where you mean “busiest” only if referring to activity (the intended meaning may be “most popular”), and “ampare.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “a best away” and “caught the attention of buyers.” Build a more precise range of collocations and check spelling so that errors do not distract from your ideas.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, including explanations with “because” and a relative clause in “a voltage meter which also shows…”. The main ideas remain understandable, but errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence boundaries occur across the response. For example, “A few months ago I want to buy” needs past tense, and “There are many companies that sales” has an agreement and verb-form problem. “Because to increase your business…” is a sentence fragment, while “Whenever, I need…” has incorrect punctuation and capitalisation. Practise forming complete sentences and maintaining consistent past tense in the personal anecdote; this will make your varied structures more controlled.

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