Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

An increasing number of companies advertise their products as new in some way in order to persuade people to buy them. In my opinion, I believe that this is a positive development, only if they were not deceiving, because companies should continuously update their products and improve their quality to meet people's needs.

Buisness companies always advertise their products as new and renovative to motivate individuals to give them a try, which in mu opinion, has a positive effect on their sales rate and on people as well. In other words, these companies should listen to society's needs and not only improve the quality of their existing products, but also create new tecnologies that will serve the customer's needs and ,therefore, will guarantee a positive revenue on their sales. For instance, vacuums, for years, were only used to clean floors from dusts and any dry impurities. All of a sudden, Dyson company invented a new tecnology that took vacuuming to a whole new level, when they released new lined desigend to clean the floors in wet and dry modes. For this reason, people were persuaded to invest their money to update their old vacuumes with this new tecnology, regardless of how expensive it is.

Without campaigns, people will never know the latest trends and decide whether or not they need to invest in a new product. Another famous example is the dandruff shampoos, which are known to cause dryness of the hair. Ten years ago, Vichy company released a product line designed to treat hair dundruf without people having to experience hair frizziness or dryness while treating their scalps. Without

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear view that highlighting novelty is positive when companies are honest, and you explain that product improvements can meet consumers’ needs. The Dyson vacuum example supports this position with a concrete illustration. However, the task asks both why businesses emphasise newness and whether this is positive or negative; the reasons are only partly explained, and the discussion focuses almost entirely on benefits. The shampoo example begins to show how advertising informs consumers, but the response ends mid-sentence, so this point is not completed and there is no concluding summary. Develop the motivation behind the marketing more explicitly—for example, attracting attention or differentiating products—and explain the condition about avoiding deception with a relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an identifiable opening position and uses examples to support the main idea, with linking phrases such as “In other words,” “For instance,” and “For this reason.” These help readers follow individual points. However, progression across the response is limited: the second paragraph combines company motives, product development, and the Dyson example, while the next paragraph introduces another example without completing it. The final “Without” leaves the argument unfinished, and there is no conclusion to bring the position together. Organise the essay into distinct paragraphs for the reasons, the evaluation, and the examples, and use clear references to connect each example to the claim it supports. This would make the overall line of argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “persuade,” “quality,” “latest trends,” and “invest,” and you attempt more specific expressions such as “wet and dry modes.” This gives you enough language to communicate the central ideas. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable and sometimes make the reader pause: “renovative,” “tecnology,” “dundruf,” and “vacuumes” are examples. Some combinations are also unnatural, such as “positive revenue on their sales” and “clean floors from dusts.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. A wider range of precise terms for advertising and consumer behaviour—such as “differentiate a product” or “attract potential buyers”—would help you express the reasons more clearly and flexibly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple and complex sentences, including a conditional opening (“only if they were not deceiving”) and a longer sentence explaining how Dyson’s product affected buyers. The main meaning is generally understandable, but errors in sentence construction and punctuation recur. For example, “In my opinion, I believe” is redundant, and the opening sentence’s “only if they were not deceiving” does not clearly identify who might deceive whom. In “when they released new lined desigend,” the clause is not integrated clearly into the sentence. There are also inconsistent spaces around punctuation and a comma before “therefore” that disrupts the sentence. Use shorter, controlled sentences when explaining examples, and check clause connections, pronoun references, and punctuation.

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