Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In recent years, as advertisment play a vital role in business success and in thier advertising, at the moment business rainforce that thier product are new in some way. In my opinion, this development has both positive and negative aspects. While it positive aspect is to gain crowd attention and its negative side is minor changes can lose attention and lead to the environment digradation and e waste.

The favourable aspect of this is that as business emphasises that thier products are changed in a way in their advertisment, they feature this because if the business want to gather the attention of crowded market therefor they have to feature the change of their products. For instance, when the new model of samsung device launched in the market they rainforce the features of thier new device in advertising, which are different from other businesses or brands.

On the other hand, despite emphasising the features the product also lead to dissonance because of several factors which affects as the first is bad timing and lack of consumar needs. However, if the product will not meet the need of users or individuals it will lead to failure. If the brand will not bring a major change or do a minor change, and the citizen will waste thier money and never come back.

As in the publicity, the enterprise highlight the feature of thier product to demonstrate that thier products are some how changed. In my opinion this trend has both positive and negative aspects, the positive aspect is to gather the market attention by illustrating thier features and changes, the negative aspect is if the empire didnot do a big change will lead to public disoppintment.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both questions by giving a reason for highlighting novelty—attracting attention in a crowded market—and stating that the trend has positive and negative aspects. The Samsung example is relevant, but it mainly repeats the idea that advertising promotes new features rather than showing why this strategy works. Your negative discussion shifts between unmet consumer needs, minor changes, wasted money and environmental harm, without explaining these points clearly or consistently. The conclusion also restates the two-sided view but does not resolve whether you consider the development positive or negative. To strengthen the response, develop a clear overall judgement and explain each main reason with a specific consequence or example; the environmental concern mentioned in the introduction, for instance, is not developed in the body.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has an identifiable introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the contrast between favourable and unfavourable effects gives it a basic structure. However, progression within paragraphs is often difficult to follow because ideas are repeated or connected unclearly. The first body paragraph moves from attracting attention to product changes and then to Samsung without fully explaining the links. In the second, “despite emphasising the features” introduces a point about dissonance, but the following sentences do not clarify how the factors relate. Connectors such as “On the other hand,” “However” and “As in the publicity” are sometimes awkward or repetitive. Use clearer topic sentences and make each paragraph develop one reason in a logical sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “advertising,” “features,” “market attention” and “consumer needs,” and you attempt more specific terms such as “dissonance.” However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation and spelling problems make parts of the argument difficult to understand. Examples include “business rainforce,” “gather the attention of crowded market,” “environment digradation” and “public disoppintment.” Some expressions, such as “the enterprise highlight the feature,” are also repetitive or imprecise. Build a reliable set of phrases for explaining marketing motives and consumer effects, and check spelling and word forms carefully. More accurate choices such as “emphasise new features” and “attract consumers in a competitive market” would make your meaning clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including conditional forms such as “if the product will not meet the need of users” and clauses beginning with “While” and “despite.” These attempts show an effort to vary sentence structure, but complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some relationships unclear. For example, “While it positive aspect is” is missing a verb, while “the product also lead” has a subject–verb agreement problem. The sentence beginning “If the brand will not bring a major change” also has an inaccurate conditional structure and an unclear connection to the following clause. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, articles and conditional patterns, and punctuate shorter, complete sentences before combining ideas.

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