Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

These days, our businesses are becoming more developed through

advertising, and it is one of the best ways to increase demand for our businesses. I think that this has both positive and negative side effects in our surroundings, and I will give you several reasons that support my views.

In the beginning, the number of businesses is increasing, and their items are new in some ways because many businesses are fully considering online platforms such as YouTube, Instagram, and Facebook; however, those apps are great ways to improve our businesses.

The first negative impact on our organisations and local companies is that it shows the number of products, by popularity, that apps add to our environmental systems.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response only minimally addresses the prompt. It mentions that businesses promote products as new and says there are positive and negative effects, but it does not explain clearly why companies emphasise novelty or develop a definite view on whether this is positive or negative. The reference to social-media platforms is relevant to advertising, yet the explanation that they “improve our businesses” does not show how novelty attracts customers. The environmental point is also difficult to understand and is not supported with an example. The response is 117 words, below the required 250, so the argument remains substantially incomplete. To improve, answer both questions directly, state a clear position, and explain each reason with a specific example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an opening paragraph introduces the topic, and the next begins with “In the beginning” before introducing a negative impact. However, the ideas do not progress into a complete argument, and the second paragraph combines the growth of businesses, online platforms, and product novelty without making their relationship clear. The transition “however” does not establish a clear contrast, while “The first negative impact” promises a point that is not fully explained. Paragraphing is present, but the response needs a clearer sequence: explain why businesses advertise novelty, then discuss the benefits and drawbacks, using linking phrases that accurately show how each idea relates to the previous one.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary is sufficient to identify the general topic, with relevant terms such as “advertising,” “demand,” “products,” and “environmental systems.” There is also an attempt to use more specific language, including “online platforms” and “local companies.” However, several choices are vague or unnatural and make the meaning difficult to follow: “our businesses are becoming more developed through advertising,” “in our surroundings,” and “the number of products, by popularity.” The repeated use of “businesses” and “ways” also limits precision. Choose vocabulary that expresses the intended relationship more directly, such as explaining that firms highlight new features to attract consumers, and use precise terms when describing environmental consequences.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response includes both simple sentences and attempts at longer structures, for example the sentence beginning “In the beginning,” which uses a subordinate clause and a semicolon. Basic sentence meaning is generally recoverable, but control becomes less reliable in longer constructions. In “I think that this has both positive and negative side effects,” the plural idea calls for “sides” or a different construction, and the semicolon before “however” is not correctly punctuated. The final sentence also has an unclear grammatical relationship between “the number of products” and “that apps add.” Aim for shorter, complete sentences while practising accurate clause connections, agreement, and punctuation; then build complexity once the relationships between clauses are clear.

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