Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In todays advertising world every business try to sell their products claiming that it is better version of other.To answer the question of why it is done so i must say that with the advancement of technology people spend most of their time using a screen in either from.It can be a mobile phone or a laptop computer .These companies target the audiences through advertisements on different channels i.e displaying adds on social media platfrom, On other applications which have huge amount of users. These companies interact with the app developers and ask them about the users interest or activities and then uses that particular infromation for displaying interest specific products to them.Concurrently these companies claim that their every progressive product is better in some way than the previous one or the other brand one.For this purpose they uses the eyecatching techniques and makes them visibilly pleasant. thus instead of selling public care they are actually selling their embellished same cheaper product.In my opinion the 21st century was supposed to the century of development keeping in view the wellfare of people however we are experiencing totally opposite of such promisesIn conclusion such adverisements techniques brings confusion to public instead of providing them clear information thus it is not in favor of humankind and is negative.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both questions: you suggest that businesses use targeted online advertising and present this trend as negative, arguing that companies make products seem better while offering little real improvement. However, the explanation of why novelty is emphasised is not fully clear: the discussion of screen use and app-user data explains how adverts reach people more than why businesses highlight newness. Your view that products are “embellished” and “same cheaper” is also asserted rather than supported with a specific example or developed reasoning. The response is below the required 250 words, which limits the opportunity to explain and support your ideas. Develop the business motive—such as attracting attention or differentiating products—and add a relevant example to address the task more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a recognisable line of thought: you move from online advertising methods to companies’ claims about products and then to your negative opinion. Linking expressions such as “For this purpose,” “Concurrently,” and “In conclusion” show an attempt to connect ideas. However, nearly the entire response is presented as one paragraph, so the stages of your argument are difficult to distinguish. Some connections are also unclear; for example, the shift from targeted advertising to claims that products are better is abrupt, and “thus” does not clearly show how the preceding point leads to your conclusion. Use separate paragraphs for the explanation, your evaluation, and the conclusion, and make each paragraph develop one main point in a clear sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to advertising and technology, including “target the audiences,” “users’ interest,” “eyecatching techniques,” and “embellished.” These choices show some range beyond basic everyday language. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable, including “platfrom,” “infromation,” “visibilly,” and “adverisements,” and some phrases are unclear or unnatural, such as “selling public care” and “same cheaper product.” These problems sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow. Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms for the business purpose and the claimed product improvements would help you explain your ideas clearly without relying on vague or confusing expressions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to combine ideas in longer sentences, for example when explaining how companies use app developers’ information to target users. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and punctuation occur frequently enough to make parts difficult to read. Examples include “every business try,” “then uses,” and “they uses”; the sentence beginning “In my opinion” also runs into the conclusion without a clear boundary. Several sentences lack spaces after full stops or use punctuation inconsistently. Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a subordinate clause, then check subject–verb agreement and sentence boundaries. Greater control of these basics would make your argument easier to understand.

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