Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-20
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Undoubtedly, nowadays advertisement increase day by day. In their promotion businesses in this modern era often emphasise that their items are now in few ways. This essay will discuss postive view point behind this notion.
Apparently, thesedays all companies products promotion on big flex and social media. First and foremost people quickly buy new item on online plateform and near shoping malls. To explain it, companies every items share on social media and advertising on big flex board on roads then people see easily new product and buy new brand quickly. Thus, people see items and buy then people can save time. For example, somtimes people buy on online plateform than populace can save money because many products on offers and very products high amount but this items on internet middle value amount these products.
Moreover, companies very money earn on advertisement because nowadays technology is increase day by day. Companies many offer on new items such buy 1 get 1 free and less amount their market price then people easily buy new products and famous own market. Companies easily run business and famous our city then people more approach new companies and buy producs. Furthermore, businesman advertisement when new product lanuch then companies choose famous person and famous influencers on internet and pay money to famous person and pay advertisement on internet plateform. After that famous person's follower buy products and this is best technique sale any things.
In conclusion, these items on advertisement this is positive development because people can easily buy new products and items.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
You give a clear positive view in the introduction and conclusion, and you attempt to explain why businesses highlight newness by discussing online promotion, offers and influencers. However, the response only partially answers the task: most of the body describes advertising and its possible benefits to buyers or companies, rather than explaining why businesses specifically present products as new. The reasons are also difficult to follow or insufficiently supported; for example, the point about saving money through online purchases does not clearly connect to product novelty. Develop two direct reasons—such as attracting attention in a crowded market or suggesting improved features—and explain each with a relevant example. Your position is present, but the argument needs clearer, more relevant development.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response has an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and basic signposting such as “First and foremost,” “Moreover” and “In conclusion” helps identify stages in the essay. However, there is no consistent progression from the question to the supporting points: the first body paragraph moves from advertising locations to buying quickly and then to saving money, while the links between these ideas are unclear. Repeated use of “people,” “companies” and “new products” also makes the writing feel repetitive, and phrases such as “After that” do not establish a clear logical relationship. Organise each paragraph around one reason for emphasising novelty, then use clear references and linking expressions to show how the example supports that reason.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.5
You use some vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “advertisement,” “social media,” “influencers,” “offers” and “market price.” However, the range is basic and repetitive, and several word choices or collocations make the intended meaning difficult to understand, such as “items are now in few ways,” “big flex” and “famous our city.” Spelling errors, including “postive,” “plateform” and “produces,” also reduce accuracy. Aim to use precise terms for the task and avoid repeating general words such as “people,” “buy” and “products.” For example, describe how a company “promotes a newly launched product” or “attracts potential customers,” then check spelling and whether each phrase sounds natural in context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
You attempt some longer sentences and use basic connectors, but sentence structures are mostly simple or joined in ways that are difficult to control. Errors in agreement and verb forms appear in examples such as “advertisement increase” and “technology is increase,” while “people see items and buy then people can save time” joins several ideas without clear grammatical relationships. Articles, plurals and sentence boundaries are also inconsistent. These frequent errors sometimes make the meaning hard to follow, although the reader can understand the general topic and your overall opinion. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them using controlled clauses—for example, “Businesses advertise new products to attract customers, who may be interested in improved features.”
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