Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In the advertising,businessess nowadas usually emphasise that their product are new in some way.this is bacause bussiness is making new things and mew products day by day.the bfer bussinessess sat that their things are new iun some way than they are true .and i strongly agree with them.day by day they are invented new things new products that are very usefull in the modren world .these bussinessess emphasize that there product are new in some ways so whatever they said they said true because in the modren world there are many things that is very useful for many people.. these products are new in some ways bacause when they invented a new proiduct these product are totally different from another .and they alsotry to made up new things and new products that are very usefull and very helpfull now a days thats helps the peoples and they also try to made something different that is different from previous product.now a days there is very demands of new thingd and new development that is very demanding thats why these bussiners are trying day by day to made up new things .and trhese things are developed from previous things and there is also new features in these products .from my own knowledge there is a example of clothes brand that are day by day produce new design and new fashion that is totally fine.and according to me this is totally positive development bacause as the world is changing so the things are also changing side bt side.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both parts of the prompt: you suggest that businesses highlight new products because they are developing items and features, and you clearly state that you see this as positive. The clothing-brand example also gives the response some relevant support. However, the explanation is repetitive and remains general: claims such as “there is very demands of new things” do not explain clearly why novelty is persuasive to consumers or beneficial to society. The response also assumes that businesses’ claims are true, without considering that “new” may be an advertising strategy rather than a meaningful improvement. Develop one or two reasons with specific explanation and examples, and make the link between your reasons and your positive judgement clearer.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is a recognisable overall direction: the response moves from a reason for advertising new products to an example and a positive conclusion. However, ideas are mostly presented as one long sequence, with no clear paragraphing to separate the explanation, example, and opinion. Repeated links such as “and,” “so,” and “because” often join several ideas without showing their precise relationship, while phrases such as “these products” and “these things” have unclear references. The repeated point that businesses make new products also limits progression. Organise the essay into distinct paragraphs, give each one a clear purpose, and use a wider range of accurate linking and referencing to show how each point develops.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a small set of relevant words, including “advertising,” “products,” “features,” “development,” and “positive,” so the general topic is usually identifiable. However, vocabulary is highly repetitive, especially “new things,” “new products,” and “useful,” and several spelling errors make reading difficult, for example “businessess,” “modren,” and “proiduct.” Some word combinations are also unnatural, such as “there is very demands” and “made up new things.” Build a broader range of topic vocabulary and check spelling and collocations carefully. More precise terms such as “product innovation,” “consumer demand,” and “improved features” would help explain the ideas without repeating the same basic phrases.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences, for example with “because” and “so,” and the reader can generally identify your main opinion. However, sentence structures are limited and many longer attempts are difficult to follow because of frequent errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence boundaries. Examples include “these products are new in some ways bacause when they invented a new proiduct these product are totally different” and “there is also new features.” Capitalisation and punctuation are also inconsistent, with several sentences running together. Practise writing shorter, complete sentences first, then add subordinate clauses while checking subject–verb agreement, past and present forms, and punctuation.

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