Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the morden world many advertising for improving product to sell in the market . This eassay will discuss the reasons behing this trend and explain why its a negative and positive development for consumer in the up comming paragraph.

Businesses emphasise newsness primarily to attarced consumer attention and increse sales . In today competitive market consumer easily get bored with old produced . By labeling an items as new companies created a sense of excitement and fun . For example smart phone companies release new phone every years with some minner change and release different colour mobile and better camera in high models .This strategy convinces people that their current devices are outdated forcing them to buy the latest version to stay trendy .

However i believe this is a negative development . Firstly it encourage a culture of waste and overconsumption . When people constantly waste there money to buy new version for trendy .they discard old iteams which damages the environment through increased electronice and plastice waste . secondly these advertisements are often misleading . Many new product are hamfull for human body but they do not give this in there lable so many consumer are buying this healty but is harmfull for human body same some pestiside are there for farming but its damages the land .

In conclusion businesses focus on new product in advertising to capture attention and beat their sales to another compatation in the market . In my opinion this trend is negative because it lead to environment pollution and tricks people into spending money on minor changes

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question: you explain that businesses promote newness to attract attention and increase sales, and you clearly judge the trend negatively. The smartphone example supports the sales argument, while the points about discarded electronics and misleading claims are relevant to your position. However, the explanation of misleading advertising is less clear and developed: the claims about harmful products and pesticides are difficult to follow and are not tied closely to how advertising presents products as new. Develop this point with a specific example and explain its effect on consumers. A more balanced, precise explanation of why businesses use this strategy would make the response more fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph explaining businesses’ motives, a paragraph giving your negative view, and a conclusion. The progression from attracting buyers to the consequences for consumers and the environment is generally understandable. You also use signposts such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “In conclusion.” However, some connections are mechanical or unclear, and several sentences run together or are separated by misplaced full stops, making the argument harder to follow. For example, the transition from discarded items to misleading product claims needs a clearer link, and the pesticide example feels abrupt. Use clearer sentence boundaries and connect each example explicitly to the point it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “consumer attention,” “outdated,” “overconsumption,” and “environment,” which helps communicate the main ideas. There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “electronice and plastice waste,” although spelling and word-form errors make these expressions less effective. Overall, the range is limited and several words or phrases are inaccurate or repetitive, including “new product,” “buy new version,” and “beat their sales to another compatation.” These choices sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to interpret. Build a more accurate set of collocations for advertising and consumer behaviour, and check spelling and word forms carefully before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a reason clause in “When people constantly waste there money…” and a participle construction in “forcing them to buy the latest version.” This shows some range, but control is inconsistent. Errors in agreement and verb forms appear in examples such as “it encourage” and “companies created,” while articles and plurals are often missing or inaccurate, as in “an items” and “Many new product.” Sentence boundaries and punctuation also need attention: “.they discard” begins incorrectly, and the final paragraph contains a long sentence with several ideas joined unclearly. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, articles, and sentence punctuation, then proofread each sentence for a complete grammatical structure.

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