Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the modern world, new products are lauching everyday and companies lauch their new products by advertisements. On that note, most of the businesses nowdays show their products in very different way via advertisements. This essay discuss why businesses do this. In my opinion it is a negative development.

There are numerous reasons why businesses do this. Firstly, due to competition. Nowadays many companies produce similar type of products. Therefore, to show that their products are better than their products they try new techniques to attract consumers. Futhermore, businesses show the benefits of products in a good way tham it have chance to get popularity of that product. Many people are easily manupulated by eye catching advertisements. As a result, companies sales increase very well. Thus, these are the reasons why businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way.

In my opinion, it is negative development. To begin with, individuals monthly budget fluctuated. Many people buy products just by watching advertisements without getting full details about product. For example, people buy shampoo by watching advertisements but after using it people hair problem is increasing. As a result, people always check product details very well. Moreover, some products are not good for health but companies shows only benefits of products not drawbacks. Hence, these are the drawbacks of advertiseing products very presiesly.

To conclude, companies do this because it help to attract consumer and compete with other companies. However, it is a negative development because it influence people's monthly budget and some products are not good for health.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both parts of the question: you suggest that businesses highlight novelty to compete and attract consumers, and you clearly state that you consider this negative. The examples about shampoo and health also relate to your concern that advertising may conceal drawbacks. However, the reasons and examples are brief and general; for instance, the shampoo example does not explain how the advertised claim leads to harm or support the point with a specific detail. The discussion of why products are presented as new could also be developed beyond competition and attracting buyers. The response contains 249 words, one word below the 250-word minimum; the 12 words copied from the prompt are not counted. Develop each main idea with a clearer explanation or example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for reasons and your opinion, and a conclusion that restates your position. This helps the reader follow the overall argument. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes mechanical: several sentences begin with “Therefore,” “As a result,” “Thus,” or “Hence,” and these links do not always show a precise relationship between the ideas. Some references are unclear, such as “their products are better than their products,” which makes the comparison difficult to follow. The conclusion repeats points already made rather than bringing them together. Use fewer formulaic connectors, make references explicit, and build each paragraph around a clear sequence of claim, explanation, and example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “competition,” “consumers,” “benefits,” “drawbacks,” and “advertisements,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems make the writing less precise. Examples include “show their products in very different way,” “get popularity of that product,” and “companies sales increase very well.” There are also misspellings such as “lauch,” “Futhermore,” “manupulated,” and “advertiseing.” These errors sometimes make the reader pause, even though the intended meaning can usually be inferred. Build a wider set of accurate phrases for describing marketing, consumer behaviour, and product claims, and proofread spelling and word forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, using structures such as “Many people buy products just by watching advertisements without getting full details” and “because it influence people's monthly budget.” However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and verb forms. For example, “This essay discuss” needs subject–verb agreement, while “companies shows” and “it help” also use incorrect verb forms. Missing or incorrect articles appear in “it is negative development” and “in very different way.” The sentence “To show that their products are better than their products” also has an unclear grammatical comparison. Practise checking each sentence for a clear subject and verb, correct agreement, and necessary articles; then vary sentence patterns while keeping them accurate.

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