Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

These days big business organization advertise their product and emphasise that their items are new form. It is a rising way of advertising, in this essay I will discuss this perspective before presenting my own opinion.

First and foremost, these days the technique of advertising is change. Nowdays, the companies want to increase their products sales. They use this technique to boost their product. There is most essential factor of this aspect that people now attrach toward a new product. They are keenly focus on the innovation and they rapidly want to use that product which has new features. Therfore, the companies are try to compete with customer demand and they emphasise in advertising that their product has new features. There can be another factor that these days the competition in the markets is so high, there are numerous competitors. Thats why companies are just trying to stay relevant in the market. This way, companies can attrach consumers and considerably boost their sales; which is eventaully benficial for the country economy.

On the other hand, there are many drawbacks of this aspects. sometimes companies are just lying in the advertisement they did not bring any innovation in their products. This can lead to fabricated advertisement and lost the trust of consumer. Furthermore, this can create a huge pressure on other businesses that they also want to create something new in their product. For instance, if apple company lunch a new phone in the market with new features, now the sumsunag company is known as their big competitor they also need to change somthing new. This create ha business war between two big giants which has detrimental effects on other small companies.

In conclusion. although these types of advertising increase the sale, this approach has numerous detrimental effects. In my opinion, this is a negative development emphasise more on that their products has new features create stress and panic between public, because everyone starting to buy so in the society pressure they also buy that product which they have no need.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both parts of the question: you explain that businesses stress novelty to attract consumers, increase sales and remain competitive, and you give a clear view that this is negative overall. The examples of misleading claims and pressure on rival firms are relevant. Your response also shows some development beyond a simple list, particularly in explaining how competition can encourage companies to imitate one another. However, the reasons are not equally developed: the claim that this benefits the national economy is asserted rather than explained, and the final point about social pressure to buy unnecessary products appears only briefly. To strengthen the response, explain these consequences with a specific example and make the link between each reason and your overall judgement more explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph explaining why businesses promote newness, a paragraph on drawbacks, and a conclusion. Linking phrases such as “First and foremost,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the argument. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, with repeated openings such as “these days” and repeated references to “this technique.” Some links between ideas are unclear: the move from competition to benefits for the country’s economy is not fully explained, and the final sentence combines several points without a clear progression. Use more precise referencing and organise each paragraph around one main idea, followed by explanation and an example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “innovation,” “competitors,” “consumer demand,” “fabricated advertisement,” and “detrimental effects.” These choices show an attempt to discuss advertising and competition beyond very basic terms. However, inaccurate word choice, collocation and spelling are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning less clear. Examples include “new form” for a new feature or innovation, “attrach toward,” “companies are try,” and “business war.” Several words are also repeated, particularly “product,” “new,” and “company,” which limits flexibility. Aim to learn common word partnerships and check spelling carefully; more precise expressions such as “highlight the latest features” and “intensify competition” would make the argument clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “that” and “if,” and you use contrast to organise the discussion. However, control is inconsistent, especially in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence boundaries. For example, “the technique of advertising is change” needs a correct verb form, while “companies are try” and “they rapidly want to use” show problems with verb construction. The sentence beginning “sometimes companies are just lying” also shifts awkwardly between present and past forms. Punctuation creates further difficulty in places, such as the comma before “which” after “sales.” Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a clearly connected supporting clause before attempting longer structures.

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