Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

ADVERTISING IS A MAJOR SOURCE OF MARKETING IN TODAY'S WORLD. ALTHOUGH SOME BUSINESS AUTHORITIES TRY TO EMPHESISE THEIR PRODUCT IN A ENOVATIVE WAY, PRODUCT WITH NEW TECHNIQUE USUALLY ATTRACTS BUYERS. FROM MY PERSPECTIVE, MOSTLY IT HAS MORE NEGATIVE IMPACT ON INDIVIDUALS AS COMPARED TO POSITIVE EFFECT.

TO BEGAN WITH, IN THE COMPLEX MARKET COMMUNITY NEW COMPNIES TRY TO LAUNCH THEIR PRODUCT WITH ATTRACTIVE MANUFACTURING SO, THEY CAN MAKE A GREAT PLACE IN THE MARKET AND AMOUNG BUYERS. THEY USUALLY EMPHAESISE OLD PRODUCT WITH LITTLE CHANGES AND ADVERTISED IT IN A UNIQUE WAY SO ALL BUYERS THINK TO BUY IT AS A NEW PRODUCT. FOR EXAMPLE, SOME MOBILE COMPANIES LAUNCH THEIR PHONE WITH MINOR CHANGES AND ILLUSTRATE THEIR PRODUCT DIFFRENTLY TO STAY POPULAR. MOREOVER, COUSTOMERS ALWAYS BUY THE PRODUCT WITH GREAT EMPHASISEMENT RATHER THAN QUALITY.

ON THE OTHER HAND, COMPNIES MIGHT USE THIS TECHNIQUES TO EMPHASISE THEIR PRODUCT SO THAT CONSUMERS CAN BUY IT, BUT IT ALSO HAS NEGATIVE IMPACT SUCH AS, THE CONSUMERS HAVE SIGNIFICANT HOPES WITH NEWLY LAUNCHED PRODUCT AND THEY BUY IT BECAUSE OF THE ADVERTISEMENT AFTER PURCHASING THEY USUALLY FACE MANY PROBLEMS WITH THE PRODUCT LIKE, NOT WORKING PROPERLY, IT COULD DAMAGE THEIR SOURROUNDINGS AND NOT THAT MUCH CONVENIENT. FOR INSTANCE, IN RECENT TIME APPLE COMPANY LAUNCHS THEIR NEW PHONE WITH LESS UPGRADE AND CLAIMED AS A NEW TECHNOLOGY ABOUT THEIR DUO PHONE WHICH IS TAKEN FROM SAMSUNG.

IN CONCLUSION, THE COMPANIES SHOUD FOCUS ON THE PRODUCTS QULITY INSTADE OF MAKE IT MORE ATTRACTIVE. ALTHOUGH, BUYERS MIGHT GET INTRESTED IN PRODUCT WHICH ARE ADVERTISED AS FAULSE PRODUCT, MAKING PUBLIC REGRET THEIR DECISION.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question: you suggest that businesses highlight novelty to attract buyers and gain market share, and you clearly judge the trend as mostly negative. The mobile-phone example supports your point that small changes can be presented as major innovations, while the discussion of disappointed customers explains a possible harm. However, the reasons businesses do this are not fully explored, and some claims—such as products damaging their surroundings—are introduced without explanation. The Apple example is also difficult to follow, so it does not clearly strengthen your argument. To develop the response further, explain the commercial motives more precisely, then support each negative consequence with a clear, relevant example and a fuller explanation of how it affects consumers. Your position is present, though the conclusion could restate it more clearly and accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signalled by “TO BEGAN WITH” and “ON THE OTHER HAND,” and a conclusion. This helps the reader follow the broad movement from business motives to possible harms. However, connections within paragraphs are sometimes mechanical or unclear. For example, the long sentence beginning “THE CONSUMERS HAVE SIGNIFICANT HOPES” joins several consequences without clear punctuation or a logical sequence. The relationship between the Apple example and the claim about consumer problems is also not made explicit. Use shorter, clearly linked sentences, and make each paragraph follow a simple progression: main point, explanation, example, and link back to your position. More precise referencing would also help clarify what “IT” and “THEIR PRODUCT” refer to.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “market,” “buyers,” “quality,” “advertisement,” and “newly launched product,” and you attempt more specific expressions such as “minor changes” and “significant hopes.” However, the range is limited and several inaccurate word choices or spellings make parts of the argument difficult to understand. Examples include “emphasise their product in a innovative way,” “attractive manufacturing,” and “great emphasisement”; these are not natural collocations. Spelling errors such as “comnpies,” “diffretly,” and “faulse” also reduce clarity. Build a bank of accurate phrases for innovation and marketing, such as “promote a new feature” or “differentiate a product from competitors,” and check spelling and word forms carefully. This would make your meaning more precise and fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a contrastive opening with “ALTHOUGH” and a reason clause beginning “SO THAT.” This shows some range, but control is inconsistent: several longer sentences contain errors that make relationships between ideas hard to follow. For instance, “AFTER PURCHASING THEY USUALLY FACE MANY PROBLEMS” needs clearer sentence boundaries, and “COMPANIES MIGHT USE THIS TECHNIQUES” has a number-agreement error. There are also problems with articles and verb forms, as in “IN A ENOVATIVE WAY” and “APPLE COMPANY LAUNCHS.” Practise building accurate sentences with one main idea and a subordinate clause, then check subject–verb agreement, articles, and punctuation. Clearer sentence boundaries would make your complex ideas easier to understand.

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