Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Nowadays, businesses are spend large amount on marketing for show or launch their products and also they commonly use slogan like 'new and improved'. I believe that this is negative effect on people.

The first and foremost resons behind this is that companies are more likely to differentiate their products from competetors by advertising on large scale. This thing lead to hike the expenditure of the company and unfortunately it is also impact the price of the product. For example, making cost of a cricket bat is only 100 dollars but businesses spend millions on brand ambassdors for promoting it, this thing make bats expensive. Secondly, advertising effects physologically on individuals because after seeing a promotion of new products they want to get it first for show off where as they already have such as smart phones like Iphone. Apple launch an iphone every year without major upgrade but people still want to upgrade it because apple spend a lot on launch events.

However, this strategy is effective for businesses but a devasting effect on society. The most significant drawback is waste. When consumers are constantly told that their current products are outdated, they tend to discard perfectly fuctional items. This leads to electronic and plastic waste. Furthermore, many products are labeled as 'new' by changing only labels such as the labels of chocolates replaced according to the festivals like Halloween.

In conclusion, if companies are improve products rather than packing or advertising can make steady growth in sales as well as less negative impact to enviornment.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

Your response addresses both parts of the question: you explain why businesses promote products as new, and you clearly judge this as a negative development. The reasons are relevant, including competition between companies, higher prices, pressure to upgrade phones, and waste. The cricket-bat and iPhone examples help make your points concrete. To strengthen the response further, develop the explanation of why businesses emphasise novelty more fully—for instance, how it attracts attention or increases sales—and clarify the link between advertising costs and the final price. The point about festival chocolate labels is relevant but brief, so explain more clearly how relabelling creates a misleading impression of innovation. Overall, the position is clear and the main ideas are supported, though some development remains general or uneven.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, a paragraph explaining business and consumer effects, a paragraph on social drawbacks, and a conclusion. Ideas generally progress logically, and signposts such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” “However,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the argument. This clear overall arrangement is a strength. Some connections are less smooth or precise: “However” introduces a point that partly continues the negative argument rather than clearly contrasting with the previous paragraph, and “this thing” is used repeatedly without a precise reference. The conclusion also introduces a recommendation about improving products that is not fully developed earlier. More varied linking and clearer references would make the progression more fluent and less mechanical.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “differentiate,” “expenditure,” “outdated,” “discard,” and “electronic and plastic waste.” These choices allow you to discuss both marketing and its consequences, and the meaning is generally clear. You also attempt topic-specific expressions such as “brand ambassadors” and “launch events.” However, some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, including “advertising on large scale,” “effects psychologically on individuals,” and “steady growth in sales.” There are also spelling errors, for example “competetors,” “ambassdors,” and “enviornment.” Aim to check spelling and learn natural word partnerships; this would make your vocabulary more precise and fluent while retaining the useful range already shown.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional idea in the conclusion and clauses beginning “because” and “when.” This gives the essay some structural variety, and readers can usually understand your meaning. However, errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction remain noticeable. For example, “businesses are spend” should use a correct verb form, while “this thing lead” needs subject–verb agreement. The sentence beginning “For example, making cost…” is not formed as a complete, natural sentence, and “if companies are improve products” has an incorrect conditional structure. Work on accurate present-tense forms, articles, and complete clause patterns, then proofread each sentence for agreement and punctuation.

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