Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-02
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In contemporary business, the advertisement plays an important role boosting companies sales and attract consumers. In recent years, businesses advertise their product highlighting the features and uniqueness. I contend that this development create negative effects financially and economically for wasteful excessive consumuption.
On the one hand, the arguement for its positive development is that its creates innovation and competition atmosphere as companies try to research and provide new features and updates to the product which result in consumer attraction. With the catchy phrases and constant advertising consumer tend to likely buy these products. For example, many smartphones companies from time to time update there phones and provide new updates and features.
On the other hand, i believe its a negative development as the businesses creates this superficial notion that new product have innovative features but in reality its simply the same and consumer usually gets attracted and waste their money on buying the new product while the old one still running and in good condition. It creates useless excessive consumption for the consumers. Consumer usually tend to buy these products just to match the social dilemma. In result comapnies usually lose loyal costumers in long term.
In conlusion, although i recognise the various advantages associated with the positive aspect of this trend but i believe the drawbacks should not be overlooked as the most products are same with features that are not necessary. It could save consumer financially and do not create extensive unnecessary usage of product they do not need.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You address both parts of the prompt: you suggest that businesses highlight novelty to attract buyers and encourage competition, and you clearly judge the trend negatively because it can promote unnecessary spending. The smartphone example is relevant, and your conclusion restates your position. However, the reasons for emphasising newness are only partly explained: the discussion of catchy advertising and consumer attraction could clarify why novelty is an effective selling strategy. Your negative argument is more developed, but claims such as companies losing loyal customers are introduced without explanation or an example. Develop each main point with a clearer cause-and-effect explanation and specific support.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The progression from a possible benefit to your preferred negative view is easy to follow, and signposts such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help orient the reader. This meets the lower-band expectations and shows some features of stronger organisation. However, links between individual claims are sometimes abrupt: the point about social pressure is followed by the claim that companies lose loyal customers without showing how one leads to the other. Some references, such as “this development” and “these products,” could also be more precise. Build smoother links by explaining relationships between ideas rather than relying mainly on paragraph-opening transitions.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “innovation,” “competition,” “features,” “excessive consumption,” and “loyal customers.” These choices allow you to communicate the main argument, and you attempt some less common expressions. However, noticeable spelling and word-choice errors reduce precision, including “arguement,” “consumuption,” “comapnies,” and “conlusion.” Some phrases are also unnatural or unclear, such as “match the social dilemma” and “creates innovation and competition atmosphere.” Aim for accurate collocations and more precise wording; for example, describe consumers as responding to social pressure, and say that companies foster competition or create a competitive environment. Proofreading spelling and word forms would make your ideas easier to read.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a contrastive structure beginning “although I recognise…” and a relative clause in “the old one still running and in good condition.” The overall meaning is generally recoverable, but some grammatical errors affect clarity and control. For example, “the advertisement plays an important role boosting” needs a grammatical link before “boosting,” while “this development create” and “companies creates” show subject–verb agreement problems. Articles and plurals are also inconsistent in phrases such as “new product have” and “many smartphones companies.” Work on agreement, article use, and complete clause structures, then check punctuation and sentence boundaries. More accurate control of these patterns would strengthen the range you are already attempting.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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