Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-02
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Producers presents their advertisements nowadays in a way that generally make people think that this particular product is somehow advance or new compare to others. Production companies primarily do this to increase their sales and to make consumers believe that they will be missing something extra ordinary if not purchase the advertised products. I believe, it has some negative impact for the consumers.
Admittedly, makers of consumer-goods play with human psychology by presenting their goods in such ways individuals will develop FOMO (fear of missing out) wich is vital for marketers to prove their products worth. For instance, a shoe company will promote their shoes as if they were crafted with the highest quality of leather so thay can sky-rocket their sales even when they are using materials that are generally the same everywhere, leather as such, can be found every other place with the same quality. Another reason would be to promote their goods differ among it's competetors. However, this will eventually leave the customers up in the air since there are range or promotion banners for the same products but of several brands.
Making it more crystal-clear with a visualisation. Lets assume you are on a show market where a vast number of banners presenting their own products some says it is hand crafted with the highest quality substance and some say theirs are the best in market. This make the buyer confused which one to buy. Nevertheless, when you visit one or two shops in the market, you immediately realise that every products are exactly the same despite the brand logo. This is because all the products are made in a same factory and the advertisements are ultimately false.
In conclusion, if production companies promote their goods transparently which they don't due to some un-known reason, people can surely meet their actual reaquirements when purchasing essentials. Additionally, legistation must be implemented by the politicians, so that the false advertisements will be reduced.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
Your response addresses both parts of the question: you explain that businesses highlight novelty to increase sales and create fear of missing out, and you clearly state that you see this as negative for consumers. The examples about shoe advertising and similar products carrying different brand logos are relevant and help illustrate your concern about misleading claims and buyer confusion. However, the reasons are not equally developed: the point about standing out from competitors is introduced but not explained in much detail, and the discussion focuses mainly on misleading advertising rather than exploring other reasons businesses stress that products are new. The conclusion proposes transparency and legislation, but these recommendations could be linked more explicitly to your argument. Developing each reason with clearer explanation would make the response more complete.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the main position is generally easy to follow. Linking expressions such as “For instance,” “Another reason,” and “In conclusion” help signal the direction of the discussion. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the first body paragraph moves from FOMO to shoe quality and then to competition without fully connecting these points. The imagined market scene repeats the earlier idea of similar products and could be integrated more efficiently. Some references, such as “This” in “This make the buyer confused,” are not fully precise, and transitions such as “Nevertheless” do not clearly express the relationship intended. Organise each paragraph around one main point and use clearer links between claims and examples.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “consumer-goods,” “FOMO,” “competitors,” “visualisation,” and “legislation,” and some choices communicate the intended ideas effectively. There are also attempts at more expressive phrasing, such as “leave the customers up in the air.” However, inaccurate word choice, collocation and spelling are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning less natural: “prove their products worth,” “show market,” and “meet their actual requirements” do not fit the intended meanings well. Several words are misspelled, including “wich,” “competetors,” and “reaquirements.” Aim for precise, conventional expressions such as “demonstrate a product’s value,” “marketplace,” and “meet their needs,” and check spelling carefully. This would make your vocabulary more controlled and easier to understand.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You use both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional structure in “if not purchase the advertised products” and a longer sentence beginning “Admittedly, makers of consumer-goods play with human psychology.” The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but some grammatical errors affect clarity. For example, “Producers presents” has a subject–verb agreement error, while “This make the buyer confused” also needs agreement. There are problems with articles, plurals and sentence construction in phrases such as “every products,” “in a same factory,” and “such ways individuals will develop FOMO.” Punctuation is also uneven, particularly in the long sentence about the shoe company. Practise building accurate complex sentences and check agreement, articles and sentence boundaries during revision.
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