Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 16 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, many businesses highlight the new features of their products in advertisements. This is mainly because they attract customers and increase their sales. I believe that it is a negative development because it promotes unnecessary spending.

To begin with, there are various reasons why businesses focus on promoting their new products in advertisements. First, They want to attract more customers. Nowadays, people often interested in new products and modern technology. If, companies highlight their new products, people can easily attracted towards that products. Secondly, companies also highlight their new features of a product. It helps in increases the demand of product and increase their productivity. For example, mobile phone companies often advertise new cameras and advanced technology to encourage people to buy their latest models. As a result, companies attract more customers and earn higher profits.

However, this trend has a negeatuve development. Primarily, it encourage people to buy thing that doesnot really needs. Many people attract towards new features and buy them immediately, even if there old product working properly. Thus,it can leads to unnecessary spending and create financial problems. For example, many people may buy new iphone every year just because it has new camera and new design and waste a lots of money. Moreover, replacing oldm products also creating more waste and harms the environment. Therefore, this type of advertising can have a negatuve impact on both individuals and society.

In conclusion, although advertisement of new products help in attract more customers and increases its productivity, I believe that this trend has a negative impact on both individuals and society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both parts of the question: you explain that businesses promote new features to attract customers and increase sales, and you clearly state that you see this as negative because it encourages unnecessary spending. The examples of phone upgrades and people buying a new iPhone despite a working older model make your position relevant and understandable. You also add an environmental consequence. To develop the response further, explain more precisely why novelty appeals to consumers, and extend the consequences with a specific link—for example, how frequent upgrades affect household budgets or electronic waste. The discussion is relevant throughout, but some points, particularly the claim about increased productivity, are not fully explained or clearly connected to advertising newness.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph explaining businesses’ motives, a paragraph presenting drawbacks, and a conclusion that restates your view. Sequencing phrases such as “To begin with,” “Secondly,” “However,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the main stages. This gives the essay a coherent progression. Some connections are less smooth, however: “It helps in increases the demand…” is difficult to follow, and “Thus,it can leads…” contains faulty punctuation and phrasing that interrupt the link between ideas. The conclusion also repeats the introduction rather than drawing the main reasons together. Use referencing and transitions more naturally, and make each example’s connection to its paragraph’s central point explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “advertisements,” “advanced technology,” “unnecessary spending,” and “financial problems.” The examples are also specific enough to make the discussion clear. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, word-form, collocation, and spelling errors reduce precision: “a negeatuve development,” “buy thing,” “new iphone,” and “waste a lots of money.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “attracted towards” and “increase their productivity” when referring to companies’ sales. Build a more accurate set of collocations for consumer behaviour and business outcomes, and check spelling and plural forms carefully. More precise vocabulary would help you express the ideas without relying on repeated forms of “new” and “increase.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a conditional sentence beginning “If companies highlight…” and a concession in the conclusion beginning “although.” This shows some range, and the main message remains understandable. However, errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction occur across the response: “people often interested,” “people can easily attracted,” “it encourage people,” and “it can leads” need corrected verb patterns. There are also problems with plural and possessive structures, as in “that products” and “there old product working properly.” These errors make some sentences awkward or unclear. Practise forming complete clauses and checking subject–verb agreement, auxiliaries, and articles; then proofread punctuation, especially spacing after commas and sentence openings.

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