Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this mordern century,some countries have a large number of youths compared to the number of elder citizens,I belive that,advantages of this situation can outweigh the disadvantages.

In this modern civilization,some countries includes a huge number of young citizens rather than older people,this can be beneficial for a nation in many ways,older citizens cannot be beneficial as youngers,as youths are a backbone of a nation,most the works are done by young citizens,such as young adults can do occupation and earn money,which is beneficial for a country,also immigrants who work as employee at other countries and sends money to thier family helps home country to develop economy,as elderly people are enable to do works.

However,people also belive there are also some disadvantages of young adults,young adults are not mature as old citizens,so young people can also make some wrong decisions for a country,as a result, it can be harmful for a nation,for example,young adults who work as a government employee can make a wrong decision while an international conference due to lack of knowledge,on the other hand,experienced citizens can handle this situation easily.

In contrast,there are numerous advantages and disadvantages of having young adults in a country.But by abonding disadvantages of having young adults ,a country should keep an open mind and can use it as a advantages in many ways,by giving them higher education and making them skilled worker for a nation.This can help economically to a country in the long run.

To sum up,a country should only use advantages of having large number of youths,by this way advantages can outweigh the disadvantages.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear overall view that the benefits of a youthful population outweigh the drawbacks, and you address both sides. The points about young adults contributing to work and the economy, and being less experienced when making decisions, are relevant. However, the support is limited: the example of a government employee making a poor decision at an international conference is hypothetical and not explained, while the economic contribution of workers abroad is introduced without showing how it relates to the population balance. The conclusion repeats your position but does not add much reasoning. Develop each main point with a clearer explanation or a specific, relevant example, and make the comparison between the benefits and disadvantages more explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has an introduction, separate paragraphs for benefits and drawbacks, and a conclusion, so the reader can identify its basic structure. However, progression within paragraphs is often difficult to follow because several ideas are joined into long strings with commas. For example, the second paragraph moves from older people’s ability to work to employment, then immigration and national economic development without clear links. Connectors such as “However,” “In contrast,” and “on the other hand” are used, but some do not express the relationship accurately; “In contrast” begins a paragraph that mainly restates both sides. Use one central idea per paragraph, order its explanation and example clearly, and use linking phrases only when their meaning fits.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “young citizens,” “older people,” “economically,” and “higher education,” and the main ideas are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or repetitive. Phrases such as “older citizens cannot be beneficial as youngers,” “abonding disadvantages,” and “use it as a advantages” make parts of the argument unclear. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “mordern,” “belive,” and “thier.” Build a more precise vocabulary for discussing population and employment, check spelling carefully, and learn common word partnerships rather than translating phrases directly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses with “as,” “so,” and “which,” but the range is limited and complex sentences are often faulty. Errors in agreement and sentence construction appear in examples such as “some countries includes” and “most the works are done,” while “young adults are enable to do works” has an incorrect verb pattern. Comma splices also make several sentences difficult to follow, particularly in the paragraph beginning “In this modern civilization.” Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, with missing spaces after commas and sentence openings not always clearly marked. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and verb patterns, and divide long sentences into shorter, complete units.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.