Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

1.Introduction

2.Avantages

3.Disadvantages

4.Conclusion

Now this time, the population of some counteries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. In my opinion it gives more advantages than the disadvantages. But we should try to control population and government make policies and laws against over population.

First of all, we discuss about the advantages of more young adults. Moreover, young people are also very important for the development of country because now time is very modern and the use of AI, social media and internet is very common. Furthermore, young generation is more strong than the older and it finds the solution of every difficulty. Young people plays vital role in every field of life like sports, development etc.

Secondly, we see the disadvantages of over population. In addition to this, the major disadvantage of increase in young population it affect on our food resources it is very challenging to provide food to every person because of lack of resources. The other disadvantage is increase in unemployement because there are limited amount of jobs are available and it is the major problem in all around the world. Lastly, it also affect economic value of our country.

At the end, increase in population of young adults is more helpful than the disadvantages. Because the young people is the need of this time. Every field like industries, medical, schools, colleges, sports cannot work well without young generation. Even in the field of science it plays a major role. But we should try to control population.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You give a clear overall view that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks, and you address both sides by discussing young adults’ contribution to development as well as pressure on food supplies, employment and the economy. However, the response only partially develops the task: claims such as young people finding “the solution of every difficulty” and being important in “every field” are broad and lack specific explanation or examples. The conclusion repeats your position rather than weighing the arguments in detail. The response is also 245 words, so it does not meet the 250-word minimum; 15 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. To strengthen the response, explain how a larger working-age population can benefit a country and support this with a relevant example, then compare that benefit directly with the disadvantages.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall arrangement: an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. This makes the main direction easy to follow. You also use signposts such as “First of all,” “Secondly,” and “At the end.” However, the numbered outline at the beginning is unnecessary, and several transitions feel mechanical or do not show the relationship between ideas clearly. For example, “Moreover” and “Furthermore” introduce points that are not developed, while “In addition to this” does not clearly connect the food-resource point to the preceding discussion. Group related ideas and use linking phrases to show cause, contrast or consequence; clearer references between sentences would also improve flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main points, including “development,” “food resources,” “unemployment,” and “economic value.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “plays a vital role.” However, the range is limited and several choices or spellings are inaccurate or unnatural, which makes some sentences less clear. Examples include “counteries,” “Avantages,” “unemployement,” “increase in young population,” and “economic value of our country.” Repeated use of “young people,” “disadvantage,” and “major” also limits variety. Aim for accurate collocations and more precise terms, such as “working-age population,” “labour market,” and “pressure on public resources,” while checking spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You communicate your main ideas using mostly simple sentence patterns, and the reader can generally understand your position. There are attempts to connect clauses, for example, “because now time is very modern,” but the response shows a limited range and frequent errors in sentence construction and agreement. In “Young people plays vital role,” the subject and verb do not agree, and “the young people is the need of this time” has the same agreement problem. Other examples include “it affect on our food resources” and the sentence fragment “Because the young people is the need of this time.” Articles and plural forms are also often missing or inaccurate. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then add controlled complex sentences using “because,” “although” and “which.”

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