Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, some countries have a larger population of young people. Some people believe that it is good for the nation, while others disagree. I firmly believe that this is very helpful for the country.

To begin with, advantages som people believe that an increased number of youngster will contribute more in gdp, because the number of taxpayers will be increased, for instance, if there are more young peoples, then count of taxpayers will be increased, which would help in economy . Moreover, they are also less vulnerable to health problems, so they are less dependent on public healthcare, and the new generation is energetic and physically active; for example, India has more youth than older people, and India is the fourth-largest economy in the world.

On the other hand, disadvantages of a smaller number of older people are senior citizens have more experience of life, so the younger people will have to learn by themselves without the support of elder generations. In addition, if the number of younger people were more, then there would be fewer employment opportunities,a good example to illustrate my view is that more young people means more resources are needed to fulfill their needs, so the burden on the government is to produce more employment. Furthermore, older people also support their children by giving them teachings, but if there are fewer, then there are probably chances that young ones are involved in crime.

In addition, there are several disadvantages of not having older people. However, the advantages of having young generations are more than those of older people.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you believe a youthful population is beneficial, and you discuss both economic and social consequences. The points about a larger taxpayer base and lower demand for healthcare are relevant, while the discussion of older people’s experience and pressure on employment addresses disadvantages. However, some ideas are asserted rather than explained. For example, the link between fewer older people and young people becoming involved in crime is not sufficiently supported, and the India example does not establish that its economic standing results from its age profile. Develop each point with a clearer explanation or a more directly relevant example, and make the comparison between the advantages and disadvantages more explicit in your conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has an overall structure, moving from an introduction to advantages, disadvantages and a conclusion. Paragraphing helps distinguish the two sides, and signposts such as “Moreover” and “On the other hand” make the direction of the discussion apparent. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the employment point shifts to government resources and then to crime without showing how these ideas connect. The opening phrase “To begin with, advantages som people believe” is also difficult to follow, and the final paragraph repeats the conclusion rather than adding a clear synthesis. Organise each body paragraph around a main idea, then explain and illustrate it before moving to the next point; use linking phrases selectively and ensure references are clear.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “taxpayers,” “public healthcare,” “employment opportunities” and “senior citizens,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “vulnerable to health problems.” However, word choice and collocation are often inaccurate or repetitive: “contribute more in gdp,” “count of taxpayers,” and “more young peoples” do not sound natural, while “teachings” is imprecise in this context. Spelling and word-form slips, including “som” and “youngster,” also reduce accuracy. Build a more reliable range of topic vocabulary and check whether words combine naturally; precise expressions will make your economic and social arguments clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a conditional structure in “if there are more young peoples, then count of taxpayers will be increased” and a reason clause introduced by “because.” This shows some range, and the overall meaning can usually be followed. However, some errors in agreement, articles, plurals and sentence construction remain. For example, “the number of taxpayers will be increased” is better expressed as “the number of taxpayers will increase,” and “senior citizens have more experience of life, so the younger people will have to learn” needs clearer sentence framing. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly around the long employment sentence. Practise accurate clause construction and review agreement and article use while retaining your attempts at complex sentences.

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