Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In the current era, the population of several countries is increasing day by day and the number of young adults more than the number of older people. This essay will discuss that this situation has more advantages or disadvantages and also i wil describe my opinion on this statement.

Nowadays, in many countries the number of young individuals more than older. In my perspective, we are living in 21st century and everything is becoming innovative. The given statement is correct that there are more young people than older ones in many countries because the marriage ratio is increasing with the time in some countries like Pakistan, India and many others and then definitely the number of individuals will be increased. With the time the older people are dying due to some health issues or may be they completed their life.

In my opinion, there are more advantage of young generation because they are spending their lives according to technology and also they are discovering new ideas that how they can their earning sources. Now most of the people can earn from home by using different online platform while this facility was not available in past times. Having older population can create some problems for young people. The most common is unemployment, which can lead to poverty and frustration. As a result, some can involve in criminal activities that will be negative impact on our society.

In conclusion, although a large number of young adults may increase unemployment and government spending if jobs are limited, I believe that the positive aspects are far more significant. With proper education, training and employment opportunities, young people can become a valuable asset for their country. Therefore, the advantages of this situation clearly outweigh the disadvantages.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the explanation regarding why young populations are advantageous relies on general statements about technology and online platforms without providing concrete examples or deeper analysis. The discussion of disadvantages is also brief and slightly disjointed from the main argument. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your points with more specific evidence or logical reasoning. While you have addressed all parts of the task, the support for your arguments remains at a basic level, which is characteristic of a Band 6.0 performance.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'In my opinion,' 'As a result,' and 'In conclusion,' to link your thoughts. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the transition between marriage rates and the death of older people feels abrupt. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would help elevate your score in this criterion.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on fairly common terms like 'increasing day by day' and 'good/bad' concepts. There are some inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'marriage ratio' instead of 'birth rate' or 'fertility rate,' and 'completed their life' instead of 'reached the end of their lives.' While your meaning is generally clear, you need to incorporate more precise, topic-specific vocabulary to demonstrate a wider range and better control over collocation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow of reading. Examples include 'the number of young individuals more than older' (missing verb), 'there are more advantage' (subject-verb agreement), and 'some can involve in criminal activities' (incorrect verb usage). Punctuation is generally functional, but the sentence structure often lacks the complexity needed for higher bands. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct verb forms, and ensuring that your complex sentences are constructed accurately.

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