Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.5)

Currently, in many countries there are much more young people than the elderly. I firmly believe that the benefits of this situation far outweigh its drawbacks. Although critics argue that this can lead to higher crime rates, I hold the view that a more educated population and growing economy are benefits that compensate for the potential disadvantages.

Foremost, any population that comprises of more young people means that there will be an increased availability of labour. There will be more doctors, more engineers and more scientists. This will lead to overall better public health, faster technological process and significant breakthroughs in scientific research. All these professions contribute greatly to a nation's economy. More older people in a country would greatly reduce the labour available as they have to retire after a certain age. Ultimately, retired individuals also need a pension which can create a strain on government's budget reducing the economic growth of a country.

Additionally, population composition greatly determines what sectors the government invests in. When there are more young adults in a country, the governments invests highly in education, jobs and and technological sector. All these investments make people more educated, more suitable to compete in job markets, and up-to-date with modern technological advancements. This would not be the case for the elderly as financial capital would be needed for old age housing facilities which do not provide a valuable benefit in return.

However, critics of this position show concern about potential higher crime rates as most crimes are committed by younger individuals. But this problem can easily be addressed through education which is already an advantage of having more young people in a country. Increased government investments in educational sector means that the youth will develop critical thinking and emotional-regulation skills which can reduce occurance of crimes. For example, research carried out in multiple countries report that highly educated individuals are less likely to commit crimes than uneducated people.

Conclusively, some people think that increased crimes rates is a disadvantage that outweights the benefits of a population comprising of more young adults than older people. But in my perspective the crime rate issue can easily be solved through more investments in education, which is a benefit of this situation, along with other advantages such as increased labour and improved economy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 8.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, clearly stating a position that the benefits of a young population outweigh the drawbacks. The ideas are relevant and well-developed, particularly the focus on economic growth and labour availability. The argument regarding crime is also logically linked to education. The response is well-structured and maintains a consistent position throughout. To reach a higher band, the student could provide more specific, real-world examples rather than general statements about 'multiple countries' to further substantiate the claims.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each paragraph has a central topic, such as economic benefits or the role of education. Cohesive devices like 'Foremost', 'Additionally', and 'Conclusively' are used effectively to guide the reader. However, there are minor instances where the flow could be smoother, such as the transition between the discussion of crime and the conclusion. Overall, the paragraphing is appropriate and the progression of ideas is clear.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.0

The student demonstrates a sufficient range of vocabulary to discuss the topic with some precision. Phrases like 'comprises of', 'technological process', and 'financial capital' are used appropriately. There are some minor inaccuracies, such as 'technological process' instead of 'technological progress' and 'occurance' (spelling error). While the vocabulary is adequate and allows for clear communication, it lacks the sophisticated, less common collocations that would characterize a higher band score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There is good control over grammar, though some errors persist, such as 'comprises of' (should be 'comprises' or 'is comprised of') and 'governments invests' (subject-verb agreement). Punctuation is generally accurate, though there is a redundant 'and' in 'jobs and and technological sector'. Despite these occasional errors, the meaning is never obscured, and the student demonstrates a solid grasp of complex sentence construction.

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