Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In recent times, the number of younger adults in some nations is rising as compared to older people. The advantage of it would be advancement in development of a country, while disadvantage being lack of guidance from older individuals. I think the advantages of this situation do not outweigh the disadvantages.

On one side, some nations recorded relatively an increased number of younger individuals compared to older people. The country's youth is responsible for future developments. Advancement in technologies and Innovations can boost the economy of a nation. New generations are able to easily adapt to a new culture and technology, while senior citizens would resist the change. For instance, younger people work fast using mobile phones and laptops, but older individuals are still stuck at paper based work. However, younger individuals still need proper guidance from someone more experienced.

On the other hand, the reduction in the population of older people impacts strict regulation in a country and presents a lack of direction for the new generation. The experience of an older person can lead a nation's youth in a positive direction. There are many situations which are faced by elderly people who can become examples of their next generation. Furthermore, the old people can teach how to handle difficult conditions with passions and hard work. For example, grandparents can teach their grandchildren life lessons that they experience throughout their life.

In conclusion, although

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of a youth-heavy population. However, the essay is incomplete, ending abruptly at 'In conclusion, although'. This failure to provide a conclusion significantly impacts the development of the argument and the overall task completion. Furthermore, the word count is below the 250-word minimum, which is a negative factor. While the position is clear, the ideas are somewhat under-developed due to the lack of a final summary and the brevity of the supporting points. To improve, ensure you complete all sections of the essay and expand on your examples to meet the length requirement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, and there is a basic attempt at logical progression. You use some cohesive devices such as 'On one side', 'On the other hand', and 'Furthermore' to signal shifts in your argument. However, the abrupt ending disrupts the overall flow and coherence of the piece. The referencing is generally clear, but the lack of a concluding paragraph makes the structure feel unfinished. To reach a higher band, focus on ensuring that each paragraph is fully developed and that the essay has a clear, logical conclusion that synthesises the main points discussed in the body paragraphs.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task but remains somewhat basic. You use phrases like 'advancement in development' and 'boost the economy', which are relevant but lack sophistication. There are some minor errors in word choice, such as 'passions' instead of 'patience' or 'passion'. The range of vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning, but it does not demonstrate the flexibility or precision required for higher bands. To improve, try to incorporate more precise academic collocations and synonyms to avoid repetitive phrasing and to add depth to your arguments.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical inaccuracies, such as 'recorded relatively an increased number' (should be 'recorded a relatively increased number') and 'the old people' (should be 'the elderly' or 'older people'). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but the sentence structure is sometimes slightly awkward. The errors present do not significantly impede communication, but they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles to enhance the accuracy of your writing.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.