Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-17
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.
Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Nowadays some countries have many number of young adults. This situation has some advantages and disadvantage, but in my opinion advantages take more. A young man have more power and strength compare to an old man.
A country have large number of young people which they perform work and contribute to work our industries and reason can grow the economy. Most valuable workers produce most production, and large number of production means strong economy. Young generation also adopted new technology easily, that's the main reason why I am prioritizing the benefits. For example if a country has a large educated young population technology and business can develop.
If jobs are not available, benefits turn into disadvantages because young people remain unemployed. In a country's youth are jobless, society collapses. Nowadays there is a large young population but in future they become old than Government face many problem because at that time they not able to do any work and they totally depend on Government.
In my opinion, there are many some challenges related with a young population, especially unemployment and pressure of education. But if Government provides jobs, education and training, the young population can become a highly valuable asset for the country.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 203 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas, which remain superficial and under-developed. While you identify both advantages and disadvantages, the arguments are repetitive and lack specific, well-supported examples. For instance, the point about economic growth is stated but not explained in depth. To improve, you must expand on your arguments with more detailed reasoning and concrete evidence. Because the task is not fully addressed due to the length constraint and lack of depth, the score is limited.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes mechanical. Phrases like 'Nowadays' and 'In my opinion' are used, but there is a lack of sophisticated linking words to connect ideas within and between paragraphs. The progression of ideas is somewhat disjointed, particularly in the transition between the benefits of a young population and the potential for unemployment. Improving the variety of transition signals and ensuring each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would enhance the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, which restricts the ability to express complex ideas. You frequently use simple terms like 'large number', 'work', and 'good'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'reason can grow the economy' and 'large number of production'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to incorporate more precise academic vocabulary and collocations related to demographics and economics. Expanding your range of synonyms and using more sophisticated phrasing will help convey your points with greater clarity and impact.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'A country have', 'young generation also adopted'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are simple or contain errors in complex structures, such as 'in future they become old than Government face many problem'. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors prevents the text from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic accuracy, such as verb tenses and pluralisation, is essential before attempting more complex sentence structures.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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