Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-19
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.
Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In contemporary era, the population has become a rising issue in number of countries. In this majority of the number includes young generation rather than older citizens. In my perspective, it is a positive development and this outweigh its negative effects which i will discuss in the forthcoming paragraphs.
To commence with, young generation are more energetic and innovative. To simplify it, country with majority of adults help to build economy and are more experienced with technology. In other words, with the advent digital and technology in every field it become difficult for older citizen to manage the balance whereas the young people are more able to observe and opt changes in the world. For a instance, work from home is very prevalent and it could only be possible with learning the technology. Furthermore, youth nowadays are more reliable to manage a workload. To explicate it, nowadays generation have more balance with keeping work and home life together. On the contrary, with facing a lot of stress in life older people cannot cooperate with work and life approach .They are more likely to be in their comfort zone rather than experimenting in learning new life changes.
On other side, older citizens are more experienced and their existence matter for getting a motivation from them. To be persistent, older generation are more approachable to keep up with the difficult time. Subsequently, they are more advanced and have a high ability to problem solving.
To wrap up, there are advantages and disadvantages of both having a youth a and older citizen in the same countries. As the responsibility and experiences varies which could affect the economy on a larger proportion. But still youth have more influence than any other generation in building the country economy.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages and disadvantages of a young population. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. While you mention that young people are 'energetic and innovative,' the supporting examples, such as 'work from home,' are not fully linked to the broader economic argument. The discussion of older citizens is quite brief and lacks depth, failing to provide a balanced comparison. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your points with more specific, well-reasoned arguments rather than relying on generalizations about age groups.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices like 'To commence with,' 'Furthermore,' and 'On the contrary.' However, some transitions feel mechanical or are used incorrectly, such as 'To be persistent,' which does not fit the context of the argument. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear; for instance, the connection between the introduction and the body paragraphs could be smoother. Improving the variety and natural flow of your linking words will help your ideas progress more logically.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'contemporary era,' 'innovative,' and 'prevalent.' However, there are instances of awkward phrasing and word choice, such as 'opt changes' instead of 'adopt changes' and 'getting a motivation from them.' Some collocations are also imprecise, which occasionally hinders the clarity of your message. To improve, focus on learning how words are typically used together in academic contexts and try to incorporate more precise, topic-specific vocabulary related to demographics and economics.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('the advent digital'), subject-verb agreement ('country with majority of adults help'), and prepositions. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some spacing issues around commas. These errors are noticeable but do not generally prevent the reader from understanding your main points. To move to a higher band, focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy and ensuring that your complex sentence structures are constructed correctly.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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