Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-25
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.
Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The global population has skyrocketed in the recent times. In today's world the quantity of young adults overweigh the quantity of the elderly in a few nations. In my believe, it has more advantages than disadvantages and the reasons for the same are glances upon in the ensuing paragraphs.
The present day culture is understood better by the present day folks. A country having more number of younger people in comparison to the older ones, it is only beneficial since masses of not much age are proven to be relatively active and enthusiastic. This also means increased labor in all aspects of work. The new generation seems extremely creative as well, they have different ambitions, goals and dreams in their life which indirectly is a major profit for the nation. The times of India newspaper once did a servey on which age group provided more for the country and the results inclined towards the more youthful masses, even in the economical terms newer people indulge more in the statistics due to their sense of quick understanding and comprehension of things.
On the contrary, the present and upcoming generation has developed a mindset of smart work over hard work which is not sufficient at times. No matter how innovative they get, they have presented themselves as lethargic and lazy over many occasions. Here, older people save the day because of their sense of hard work, these folks never built a habit of procrastination.
Agglomerating the aforementioned points, it can be concluded that the newer generation provides for the country far more than the older ones.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages, maintaining a clear position that the advantages outweigh the drawbacks. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For example, the argument regarding 'labor' and 'creativity' is stated but lacks specific, well-explained examples to support the claims. The reference to a newspaper survey is vague and lacks detail. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your points with more concrete reasoning or real-world examples. The conclusion is also quite brief and does not fully synthesize the arguments presented in the body paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. There is an attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'On the contrary' and 'Agglomerating the aforementioned points'. However, some transitions feel mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as 'the reasons for the same are glances upon'. Additionally, the flow within paragraphs could be improved; some sentences feel disjointed, particularly in the second paragraph where the transition from labor to creativity is abrupt. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the overall coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using words like 'skyrocketed', 'enthusiastic', and 'procrastination'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'in my believe' (should be 'in my belief' or 'in my opinion'), 'masses of not much age' (unnatural phrasing), and 'economical terms' (should be 'economic terms'). These errors occasionally hinder the precision of your argument. To improve, focus on learning collocations and using more precise academic vocabulary rather than relying on wordy or non-standard phrases.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'the quantity of young adults overweigh' (subject-verb agreement error: 'overweighs'), 'a country having more number of younger people... it is only beneficial' (comma splice/run-on structure), and 'servey' (spelling error). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your points, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and refining your use of complex sentence structures.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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