Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-28
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.
Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In recent times some countries' populations of young ones are more as compared to elderly. This essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this situation.
On the one hand there are more benefits of the younger generation as compared to older. There are many reasons like greater cognitive ability, younger body and they have more courage of doing work than old people. The nation with a greater number of young brains would help the nation grow faster because their brain would work more creatively and innovatively as compared to elderly and they would have more productive ideas due to their curiosity of finding new and more efficient ways to work. Moreover, their body works more efficiently than senior citizens and they are more flexible which helps them do more work as compared to golden agers.
On the other hand, old people are an asset to the country as well as younger generation. Elderly can guide as well as help youngsters in various situations because they are more experienced and wiser. Moreover they help in saving the past culture and traditions because recent generations are not much into traditions and prefer their own way. Another advantage of elder people that they have more expertise over taking care of children, managing money and remembering numerous stories for bedtime.
To conclude, although both generations have their own advantages and disadvantages, the benefits of the younger population are far more significant and cannot be overshadowed by its drawbacks. In my opinion, the collaborative efforts of both generations can help the country grow much more.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of a young population. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding 'cognitive ability' and 'younger body' is repetitive and lacks specific examples or depth. While a position is stated in the conclusion, the body paragraphs rely on generalizations rather than well-supported arguments. To reach a higher band, you should provide concrete examples—such as economic growth statistics or specific societal impacts—to substantiate your claims. The essay covers all parts of the task, but the lack of depth in supporting arguments limits the score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression from the introduction to the body and conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'Moreover', and 'To conclude' are used to link ideas. However, some transitions feel mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally imprecise, such as the phrase 'another advantage of elder people that they have'. The flow between sentences is generally clear, but the essay would benefit from a wider variety of cohesive devices to improve the sophistication of the text.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. You rely on basic descriptors like 'young ones', 'younger generation', and 'old people'. While you attempt some less common vocabulary such as 'innovatively', 'efficiently', and 'collaborative', there are instances of awkward phrasing, such as 'courage of doing work' and 'golden agers', which is an informal idiom not well-suited to an academic essay. To improve, focus on using more precise academic collocations and avoiding repetitive phrasing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as missing articles ('the' younger generation), subject-verb agreement issues ('another advantage... that they have'), and awkward phrasing ('populations of young ones are more as compared to elderly'). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, focus on article usage, consistent sentence structure, and proofreading for minor slips in grammar and punctuation.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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