Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this contemporary era, both generations older and youngster plays an important role. It is often argued that in many nations the population of young adults are much higher than the number of older people. This essay will discuss how the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages.

On the one hand, there are fewer drawbacks of less population of elder generation. First and foremost is that people would loss their identity. older people usually tells about ancestors, colture and traditions, which helps people to remain connected with their society. Secondly, old people generally have more life-experience as campared to the young people, they can teach them at workplace, in studies and even help them to learn essential skills such as communication team-work and problem-solving. Hence they become more responsible and disciplain in their future life. In addition, sometimes the advice from old people are much useful for youngsters to make decisions related to their relationship, career and life. So, without old generation young people would face many challenges.

On the other hand, nowadays young people have valuable knowledge about technology, It makes both learning and work much convenient

It reduce life risks, increase efficiency of work and saves time. Thus, life becomes less stressful and it improve productivity. Moreover, youngsters are more energetic and creative as compared to the old people. They do work smartly, for example, in physical demanding work they use automated machines and operate them easily with computer softwares. Moving further, the increasing population of young people would help to reduce the problem of labour force in future as well as young people would get more opportunities for better jobs in employment sectors, so they can support their families and stabilise their income.

In conclusion, Although older generation plays an significant role because the provide valuable knowledge about culture, traditions and life experience. But youngsters are the future of countries as they fulfil the needs of labour force, have advanced technical knowledge and are more energetic. Due to these qualities , they are more advantageous

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The essay addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. You have identified both sides of the argument and provided a conclusion that supports your stance. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While you provide relevant points regarding the benefits of both age groups, some arguments, such as the 'loss of identity' or 'life risks', are asserted rather than fully explained or supported with concrete examples. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is expanded with a specific illustration or a deeper explanation of the 'why' and 'how' behind your claims. The response is balanced, but the depth of analysis could be more consistent.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a distinct focus. You use cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'Secondly', 'In addition', and 'Moreover' to guide the reader through your arguments. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly repetitive. Additionally, there are instances where the flow between sentences is slightly disjointed, such as in the second paragraph where the transition between the loss of identity and the benefits of life experience could be smoother. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and the overall progression of ideas is easy to follow despite these minor issues.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'labour force', 'productivity', and 'automated machines'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and spelling mistakes, such as 'colture' (culture), 'disciplain' (disciplined), and 'as campared to' (compared to). Furthermore, some phrasing is slightly unnatural, such as 'fewer drawbacks of less population'. To improve, focus on refining your spelling and using more precise collocations. Expanding your range to include more sophisticated synonyms would also help elevate your score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is a positive step. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('the population... are', 'advice... are') and article usage ('the older generation', 'the young people'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some run-on sentences and comma splices, such as 'It makes both learning and work much convenient, It reduce life risks'. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your message, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall fluency and accuracy of your writing.

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