Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In some countries, the population of young adults are considerably larger in number as compared to older people. Although this demographic trend may present certain challenges , however I believe that the advantages outweighs the disadvantages.

One significant advantage of having a relatively young population is the availability of a large workforce. A greater number of working-age adults can contribute to economic productivity, while also generating higher tax revenues for the government. Consequently, countries with a younger demographic may have greater financial resources to invest in areas such as education, healthcare and infrastructure.

However, a large young population can also place considerable pressure on a country’s resources. If the number of young people entering the workforce exceeds the availability of jobs, unemployment may rise significantly. This could lead to greater competition for employment and increase the financial burden on governments, particularly if they are required to provide additional education, training and social support.

In conclusion, although a predominantly young population can create challenges, particularly in terms of employment and pressure on public resources, I believe that the advantages are greater. A large working-age population can contribute substantially to economic growth and provide governments with a stronger financial base for future development.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of a young population. However, the essay is significantly under the 250-word minimum requirement, which severely limits the depth of the arguments. While the position is clear, the ideas are not fully developed; for instance, the points regarding economic productivity and unemployment are mentioned but lack specific examples or detailed analysis. Because the response is only 201 words, it fails to meet the length requirement, which is a key component of task achievement in IELTS. To improve, you must expand on your points with more detailed explanations and concrete examples.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'consequently', 'however', and 'in conclusion' are used effectively to guide the reader through the argument. The progression of ideas is logical, moving from the benefits of a young workforce to the potential challenges of unemployment. While the structure is sound, the brevity of the response makes the overall flow feel somewhat abrupt. The paragraphing is appropriate, and the relationship between ideas is generally clear throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate and functional for the task. You demonstrate a good grasp of topic-specific terms such as 'demographic trend', 'economic productivity', 'tax revenues', and 'financial burden'. There is sufficient range to convey your ideas clearly. However, the vocabulary is somewhat standard and lacks the more sophisticated or idiomatic expressions that would push the score into the higher bands. There are no significant spelling or word-choice errors that impede communication, but the range is limited by the short length of the essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. You demonstrate control over basic grammar, though there is a noticeable error in the first sentence: 'the population... are' should be 'is' to agree with the singular subject 'population'. Additionally, the phrase 'Although... however' is redundant; you should use one or the other, but not both in the same sentence. Despite these minor errors, the grammar is generally accurate and does not impede understanding. To achieve a higher band, you should incorporate a wider variety of complex grammatical structures and ensure consistent subject-verb agreement.

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