Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.
Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Nowadays, diversity in the population of several nations have gathered significant amount of attention of people and scientists and governments. In several countries, young generations are in larger number compared to senior citizens. According to me, there are more advantages than disadvantages of this kind of population.
Young adults are the driving force of any country, as they are valuable asset of nation. Younger generations are more energetic, full of curiosity, have potential to create a significant influence on a country. Furthermore, they create job opportunities, provide labors and create more technological advancement. Apart form this, young individuals ensures long term development and growth of population of a country, which is the biggest advantage of having large number of young adults in the population of a country.
The older people have ethical values, and experience which can become valuable asset for young individuals, but these ethical values and experience cannot contribute in the development of a country, as they obsolete and cannot provide a solution for modern generation. However, importance of having older people in population is important which ensures that the new generation stays connected with history, culture and religion of the nation.
Therefore, it can be concluded that, having more number of young adults than older people in population of a country is advantageous that outweighs the demerits of having lower number of senior citizens, as they have the potential to bring several changes that can contribute for creating a positive development for the nation, on the other hand importance of having older people should not be undermined, because of the values and the experience they have is an asset for younger generation.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. The advantages of a young population are explored with relevant points such as economic growth and technological advancement. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited; for instance, the argument that older people's values are 'obsolete' is a sweeping generalization that lacks nuance and depth. While the task is addressed, the supporting arguments could be more thoroughly extended to reach a higher band. The conclusion effectively summarizes the position, but the overall development of the counter-argument regarding the elderly is slightly underdeveloped compared to the advantages section.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear central topic. Cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore', 'Apart from this', and 'Therefore' are used to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel repetitive. Referencing is generally clear, but the progression of ideas within the second paragraph could be smoother. The use of paragraphing is appropriate, and the essay follows a standard structure that allows the reader to follow the argument without difficulty. To improve, the student should focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices to create more natural transitions between sentences.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the student to convey their meaning clearly. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary, such as 'technological advancement' and 'driving force'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and minor errors, such as 'provide labors' (should be 'labor') and 'obsolete' used as an adjective without a verb (e.g., 'they are obsolete'). The range is sufficient to discuss the topic, but the lack of more sophisticated collocations and occasional inaccuracies in word form prevent a higher score. The vocabulary is functional but lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues (e.g., 'diversity... have gathered', 'young individuals ensures'). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but there are some awkward phrasings that impact the flow. The student attempts complex sentences, but these often contain errors that slightly impede the reader's experience. To improve, the student should focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles, as these are recurring issues throughout the text. More attention to sentence variety and error correction would significantly improve the score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.