Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-09
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.
Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The population of some countries have large number of the young adults in contrast with the number of the older people. The young adults are the future of any country and the progress of any nation mainly dependent on them because they learn new things and create a huge impact on the economy of the country by their personal growth.
The population of the young adults provides several advantages. Firstly, the young have freedom of the time and have enough energy to utilize in a productive work for creating an impact and may prove helpful for the growth of the country. secondly, in this modern era the people having age range from 19-26 they are creating the skills that offers the financial freedom to the people also helping the people to learn about these type of the skills and achieve success in their life.
On the other hand, it is also creating serious issues if the young adults are not goals oriented then they may suffer to bad habits like robbery and may be addicted to the bad habits that may lead to destruction of the society and also harmful for the country. children follow the things that our young will follow on the daily basis if they are distracted then they will also destroy the future of the children too.
In conclusions, the advantages of the large number of the population outweigh as compared to the older one because they are following the digital skills now a days and our older have zero knowledge about these skills.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of a young population. However, the development of ideas is limited. While you mention economic growth and potential social issues like crime, these points are not fully supported with specific examples or deep analysis. The conclusion clearly states your position, but the overall argument feels somewhat superficial. To improve, ensure each body paragraph provides a clear, well-explained point supported by a concrete example or logical consequence, rather than listing general statements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally inaccurate. For instance, the transition 'secondly' is used without a clear preceding 'firstly' in the same paragraph structure, and the flow between sentences is sometimes disjointed. Referencing is also inconsistent, such as in the third paragraph where the connection between 'young adults' and 'children' is unclear. Improving the variety and precision of linking words will help create a smoother progression of ideas.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for a higher band. You rely on basic phrasing such as 'huge impact' and 'bad habits'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'suffer to bad habits' (should be 'fall into' or 'succumb to') and 'the people having age range'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more sophisticated vocabulary and collocations that are appropriate for an academic context, while ensuring they are used accurately.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include incorrect article usage ('the population of some countries have large number of the young adults'), subject-verb agreement, and awkward phrasing ('the young have freedom of the time'). While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors limits the score. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for articles and pluralization would significantly improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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