Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

While having a larger number of youth in a country is considered more beneficial to the country as youth tend to be more innovative and provides more advancement in the industry and economy. Regardless of these benefits, it should not be overlooked that the older people have alot more experience in their relevent field and are the reason for the stabalized economy and industry.

I disagree that having more young adults is better for the coutnry as while the youth is more energetic and having abundant youth could be beneficial for the country but if there are less older people then they youth will have alot less oppertunities to learn from the experienced and knowledeable individuals. Furthermore, as there will be significantly larger youth and there aren't as many jobs available then it could lead to poverty and it could lead to increased crime rate in the country. The older people provides better guidance and expertise which could help the youth learn and become better individual in both their personality and their work. One recent example is the youth calling themselves GenZ, which don't respect their elders and also don't take their work seriously and always look for ways to become lazy.

while I disagree that young adults provides benefits which outweight the disadvantages, it is true that it also provides significant advantages as well such as technology inovation as older adults are more resistant to change compared with younger adults.

In conclusion, having more youth adults is not always more advantages compared to its disadvantages due to factors like limited jobs, less skilled individuals among youth and increased crime rate.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages and disadvantages of a youth-heavy population. However, the position is somewhat inconsistent; you state you disagree that having more young adults is better, yet you acknowledge their benefits. The development of ideas is limited, particularly in the second paragraph where the argument relies on generalizations about 'GenZ' rather than objective socio-economic analysis. To improve, ensure each point is supported by clearer reasoning or evidence rather than subjective opinions about generational behavior. The conclusion is brief but summarizes your stance effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often repetitive or mechanical. For example, the frequent use of 'and it could lead to' creates a repetitive sentence structure. Transitions between ideas are sometimes abrupt, such as the shift from the introduction to the body paragraph. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'consequently', 'furthermore', 'conversely') and ensure that the progression of ideas within paragraphs is smoother and more logical.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. There are several spelling errors, such as 'relevent', 'stabalized', 'coutnry', 'oppertunities', 'knowledeable', and 'inovation'. Additionally, some word choices are informal or imprecise, such as 'alot more' and 'always look for ways to become lazy'. To improve, focus on expanding your range of academic vocabulary and proofreading carefully for spelling mistakes, as these errors occur frequently throughout the text.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'the older people provides', 'young adults provides'), incorrect verb forms, and punctuation errors. Some sentences are run-on or lack proper structure, such as the opening sentence which is a fragment. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and sentence construction. Aim to vary your sentence length and structure while ensuring that each sentence is grammatically complete and punctuated correctly.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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