Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Today, some countries have a lot of young adults and very few elderly people. While it cause a few problems, I think it is mostly a good thing for a country.

On the one hand, there are minor problems with this situation, first when there are too many young people it can be hard for everyone to find a job. This creates a lot of competition between individuals. So main problem is faced by government to build new colleges and schools for childrens, additionally large amount of money should be spend on the construction of new schools and house for adults. For instance, in some growing countries such as India, many young people finish school but struggle to find a job, which can make them frustrated and a feeling of depression also come in their minds.

On the other hand, benefits are much higher because young generation is a country greatest strength. Young people have a lot of enery, learn new technology quickly and like to start a business. These people work hard and pay taxes to their government and help companies to grow. For example, in Japan older population is higher than younger population and it faces struggle with economy because they donot have enough young worker to protect their country's economy. As a result, young workforce keep the country alive and moving forward.

In conclusion, having a lot of young individuals put pressure on jobs and housing at first. However, the economic growth and energy they bring are much more important. Therefore, advantages are stronger than disadvantages.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the task, presenting a clear position throughout the essay. The student considers both the disadvantages, such as high competition for jobs and pressure on education and housing infrastructure, and the advantages, such as economic growth, energy, and taxation. Ideas are extended with relevant examples, such as mentioning India and Japan. However, the development of some points remains a bit general and could be extended further with deeper analysis to reach higher band levels. Overall, the prompt is fully addressed with a consistent position, aligning well with the Band 7 descriptor.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay displays clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Information and ideas are generally coherent, and the response uses appropriate transition signals such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion'. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to separate the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, referencing and cohesive devices are occasionally a bit mechanical or faulty, such as in the sentence 'So main problem is faced by government', which impacts the natural flow of ideas. These features place the response securely within the Band 6.5 to 7.0 range, and a Band 6.5 is awarded to reflect the mechanical elements in cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'competition', 'infrastructure', and 'workforce'. However, there are noticeable slips in word choice and collocation, such as 'While it cause' instead of 'causes', and 'a feeling of depression also come in their minds'. Furthermore, spelling and grammatical form errors occasionally surface, such as 'enery' instead of 'energy' and 'childrens' instead of 'children'. Despite these limitations, communication is not impeded, and the vocabulary used is sufficient for the task, satisfying the criteria for Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response includes a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some attempt at subordination and relative clauses. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('While it cause', 'young generation is'), missing articles ('build new colleges', 'spend on the construction'), and punctuation flaws. Complex structures tend to be less accurate than simple sentences. While these errors do not impede overall communication, they prevent the text from achieving a higher score. The presence of these recurring errors is characteristic of the Band 6 descriptor.

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