Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-13
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.
Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
As far as this topic is concerned, I would like to say that the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Which has always been debatable and has now become more controversial with many people claiming that it is beneficial while others reject this notion. The substantial influence of this trend has sparked the controversy over the potential impact in recent years. From my perspective, the former proposition appears to be more rational. This essay will further elaborate my views for favoring the positive or negative impact of this trend and thus will lead to a logical conclusion.
Analyzing the statement further, the primary reason behind this is that young adults are generally energetic, educated and willing to work. They can fill different jobs and increase the productivity of businesses and industries.. Categorically discussing, it cannot be ignored that the main reason behind this is that especially in our country, it has far-reaching consequences.These problems can be reduced if governments invest in education, skills and job creation.
Moving further, it is pertinent to mention that it is the basic duty of the government to provide a safe and stable society for the betterment of the public. It is imperative for the authorities concerned to look into the factor behind this issue and take drastic action against the concerned persons.
To encapsulate, I would like to appeal to the learned figures to come forward, focus their gaze on this issue and launch a vigorous campaign to reform it across the society.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to address the prompt regarding the advantages and disadvantages of a population with a large number of young adults. However, the development of ideas is limited and disjointed. In the introduction, the writer states that the former proposition appears more rational, but the body paragraphs fail to sustain a clear line of argumentation. The second paragraph briefly touches upon productivity before trailing off into a confusing tangent about government intervention and educational investment. Subsequent paragraphs introduce vague ideas about 'safe and stable society' and 'drastic action against the concerned persons,' which are off-topic and do not directly answer whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Consequently, the task is addressed only partially, corresponding to a Band 5 descriptor.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay lacks clear logical organisation and progression. The introduction is overly reliant on memorised or copied phrasing ('As far as this topic is concerned, I would like to say that the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults...'), which awkwardly echoes the prompt. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion is faulty. Phrases like 'Moving further' and 'To encapsulate' are used mechanically, and referencing is often unclear (e.g., 'the factor behind this issue'). There is no clear overall progression of ideas, with sentences jumping abruptly from economic productivity to government campaigns, placing this performance at Band 5.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for basic communication but is limited and repetitive. The writer employs some appropriate terms such as 'productivity,' 'industries,' and 'education,' but also relies heavily on vague or inappropriate phrasing like 'drastic action against the concerned persons' and 'learned figures to come forward.' There are noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'favoring the positive or negative impact' instead of weighing the pros and cons. The lexical range is minimally adequate to convey basic points, aligning with a Band 5 score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response shows an attempt at complex sentence structures, but these are frequently faulty or incomplete. For example, the sentence 'Which has always been debatable and has now become more controversial...' is a sentence fragment. Another error involves punctuation and duplication, such as 'industries.. Categorically discussing.' There is a mix of simple and complex forms, but frequent errors in grammar, sentence boundaries, and punctuation cause some difficulty for the reader and obscure the intended meaning. This performance fits the Band 5 descriptors.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.