Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Currently, the population of young individuals in some countries is relatively higher than the number of elders. In my opinion, I believe that the positive effects of this circumstance is comparably higher than the negative effects.

On the one hand, young generation has refused to accept the bad situation,

they try to improve it by finding better job opportunities and starting their own business. For instance, young enterprenuers start their own business at low-paid position and after sometime they work hard to learn new skills, which benefit company's economic growth. Moreover, youngsters are more prone to learning and they grasp complex things more efficiently than older people. They can contribute in accelerating country progress. Today's generation, which is known as Gen z are very intelligent and dedicated to their work. For example, several young individuals have become influencers and run online platforms to support their family and fulfill their own needs. Additionally, whenever some violent cases are report, such as minor rapes, crimes and women rights problems, they work as a community to raise awareness against it. They inssist government to take action against it as soon as possible. As compared to older people, they can't serve the country for the longer period beacuse at such age they become weak and less intelligent.

On the other hand, as population is increasing day by day, so young individuals require more job opportunities, better health facilities and top-tier education. For instance, due to increasing population the competition rise among them for availing better opportunities.

In conclusion, whether competition rise among the young individuals due to over population, I believe that country gets benefit from them in many ways. They help to increase progress of country.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The student addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of having a young population, ultimately taking a clear position that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Ideas are introduced, such as economic growth, rapid learning abilities, and societal awareness regarding crimes and rights. However, several ideas are underdeveloped or lack depth, such as the sudden mention of influencers or vague assertions about older people becoming 'weak and less intelligent.' The conclusion briefly touches upon competition due to population size. This places the response comfortably at Band 6, as it addresses all parts of the task with relevant ideas, though some are inadequately extended and border on over-generalisation.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with clear signaling phrases such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion'. Paragraphing is utilized, though the main body paragraph is overly dense and contains multiple disparate ideas that would ideally be separated into distinct paragraphs. Cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical, and referencing is occasionally unclear, such as pronoun ambiguity in 'whenever some violent cases are report... they work as a community'. While logical sequencing is attempted, the progression within the body paragraph falters due to a lack of smooth transitions between the various points raised. This aligns best with Band 6 criteria for coherence and cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student attempts less common vocabulary and displays an adequate range for the task, utilizing terms like 'circumstance', 'economic growth', 'influencers', and 'awareness'. However, there are notable spelling errors ('enterprenuers', 'inssist', 'beacuse') and word-form inaccuracies ('competition rise' instead of 'competition rises', 'minor rapes' which is unnatural collocation). Despite these flaws, the vocabulary used is sufficient to communicate the main arguments effectively without impeding the reader's understanding. This performance is consistent with the Band 6 descriptor, which notes an adequate range with some errors in word choice, form, and spelling.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some variety in structure. For instance, conditional or relative clauses are attempted, as seen in 'Today's generation, which is known as Gen z are very intelligent...' and 'whenever some violent cases are report...'. However, there are frequent grammatical and punctuation errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('positive effects... is', 'competition rise'), missing articles ('benefit country's economic growth'), and tense inconsistencies ('they can't serve... because at such age they become'). While these errors are noticeable and require the reader to occasionally re-read, they do not severely impede overall communication, placing the grammar squarely at Band 5.5, rounded to Band 6 for mixed simple and complex forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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