Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Currently, the population of young individuals in some countries is relatively higher than the number of elderly. I believe that the positive effects of this circumstance are comparably higher than the negative effects.

On the one hand, the young generation has refused to accept the bad situation, they try to improve it by finding better job opportunities and starting their own business. For instance, the young entrepreneurs start their own business at low-level positions and after some time they work hard to learn new skills, which benefits the company's economic growth. Moreover, the youngsters are more prone to learning and they grasp complex things more efficiently than older people. They can contribute to accelerating the country's progress. Today's generation, which is known as Gen Z, is very intelligent and dedicated to their work. For example, several young individuals have become influencers and run online platforms to support their family and fulfill their own needs. Additionally, whenever some violent cases are reported, such as minor rapes, crimes and women's rights problems, they work as a community to raise awareness against them. They urge the government to take action against them as soon as possible. As compared to older people, they can't serve the country for a longer period because of their physical health.

On the other hand, as the population is increasing day by day, so the young individuals require more job opportunities, better health facilities and top-tier education. For instance, due to increasing population the competition rises among them for availing better opportunities.

In conclusion, whether competition rises among the young individuals due to the population, I believe that the country gets benefits from them in many ways. They help to increase progress of the country.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of having a large youth population compared to older generations. The writer takes a clear position that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, supporting this stance with arguments related to economic growth, adaptability, and social awareness, while briefly acknowledging the disadvantage of increased competition for resources. However, some ideas are slightly underdeveloped or general, such as the mention of 'minor rapes, crimes and women's rights problems,' which could have been tied more clearly to broader societal benefits. The main points are present and logically structured, placing the response solidly in the band 6.5 to 7 range. To reach a higher band, the ideas would need more thorough extension and avoidance of slight tangential drifts.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay displays a clear overall progression with appropriate organisational markers such as 'On the one hand,' 'Moreover,' 'Additionally,' and 'On the other hand.' Paragraphing is used sufficiently to separate the introduction, the body paragraphs discussing advantages and disadvantages, and the conclusion. However, cohesion can occasionally feel somewhat mechanical rather than entirely natural, and referencing within sentences (such as the pronoun use in 'against them as soon as possible') can occasionally cause minor ambiguity. Overall, the logical flow is easy to follow, meeting the requirements for a band 6.0 or 6.5 comfortably.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common lexical items such as 'entrepreneurs,' 'accelerating,' 'influencers,' and 'top-tier.' There are, however, some instances of awkward word choice and collocation, such as 'bad situation' instead of 'adverse conditions' or 'challenging circumstances,' and 'minor rapes' which is unnatural phrasing. Spelling is generally accurate, and vocabulary errors do not impede communication, allowing the reader to grasp the intended meaning without confusion.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, with several error-free sentences present, particularly in the discussion of economic growth and social issues. There are, nevertheless, noticeable grammatical errors and awkward structures, such as 'so the young individuals require' (unnecessary conjunction use after a clause) and 'they can't serve the country for a longer period because of their physical health' (where pronoun reference regarding who 'they' refers to is slightly ambiguous between youth and elderly). Punctuation is generally functional, but control over complex grammar is inconsistent.

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