Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-14
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.
Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
It is true that now a days the population of some countries of young adults is has became relatively large compared to the old people.
I believe that this development is absolutely more with advantages as there are many young generation people doing effort for their better tomorrow as are doing better than the people before or are past away as old people. Every country has their own ideas of developing something beneficial for their country. So young people that are mostly able to do efforts to make a progress for their lives and for their country too. In addition some countries have been providing great convenience to people which is one of the most common reason that many young adults have been moving to that country for example, Netherlands involves a large number of young adults.
Similarly there are many countries in the Europe that involves large number of young adults. If we take a look to the disadvantages of this situation so there a lots things to learn from our elders and those ideas which are relative to our lives that we can't learn without the ideology of older people if we're not giving them any value. So most of the countries believe to have an older generation too.
In the end I would love to mention that we should that a nation or a state belongs to their population first and these both will always be successful having the ideology of both young adults and the older people.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to address the prompt regarding whether the advantages of a youth-heavy population outweigh the disadvantages. However, the position is not consistently clear throughout, and the ideas lack full development. The student mentions economic progression and youth migration to countries like the Netherlands, but these points remain superficial and are not robustly supported with well-reasoned examples. On the opposing side, the mention of wisdom from elders is briefly touched upon in phrases like 'there a lots things to learn from our elders', but this idea is under-developed and abruptly concluded. The response satisfies the minimum length requirement, but the overall task response falls short of Band 6 due to limited idea extension and lack of a well-maintained, clear position.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The text is organized into four paragraphs, reflecting a basic attempt at structuring an essay introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the logical progression is frequently disrupted by awkward transitions, such as starting a paragraph with 'Similarly there are many countries in the Europe...' when introducing disadvantages rather than a similar advantage. Cohesive devices are either missing, inadequate, or repetitive, making the flow disjointed. Referencing is also unclear in places, such as in the concluding sentence where pronouns like 'these both' are ambiguous. Paragraphing is present, but overall cohesion is faulty and mechanical, aligning with the Band 5 descriptors.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with frequent reliance on simple words like 'people', 'countries', and 'things'. There are noticeable lexical limitations and inappropriate word choices, such as 'doing effort' instead of 'making an effort', and 'are past away' instead of 'have passed away'. While the writer attempts to use some less common words, such as 'ideology' and 'convenience', these are frequently used with unnatural collocation or inaccurate meaning in context. These errors and the limited range of vocabulary occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, placing the response firmly at Band 4.5, rounded to 5.0 for adequate task completion attempts.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The response displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, and attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty and obscure meaning. For instance, the opening sentence—'It is true that now a days the population of some countries of young adults is has became relatively large compared to the old people'—contains severe structural and tense errors. Other examples include 'young generation people doing effort for their better tomorrow as are doing better than the people before or are past away as old people', which is largely incomprehensible. Frequent errors in tense, subject-verb agreement, and punctuation cause considerable difficulty for the reader throughout the text.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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