Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-16
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.
Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In recent times, it has become increasingly common that young adults are in higher ratios than older citizens in some states. Although this development has some disadvantages, I believe that its advantages outweigh the drawbacks.
there are several significant advantages associated with this situation. The crucial benefit is economical growth. It can leads to a progressive country as young adults are serving their nation by working in numerous fields by positive impact on GDP. For instance most of the young adults are well doctors and engeniers. They are working in diffetrent fields by doing svera;l researchs and projects which nominates their state among world as well as in forms of funds which plays vital role in progress of any nation. In addition, they are actively paying taxes to the government which is foundation of any developed country.
On the other hand, there are also some drawbacks. The most important is the lack of experienced people in any field as experince is key of success. Older people are close to their culture. In this digital era, most of youngs and adults are far away from their tarditions and moral ethics. They have lack of spirit to make bonds to help on another. For instance, our grand parents are the main cause of sticking our families together by inviting us all to them.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of having a population with a large proportion of young adults and clearly states a position that the advantages outweigh the drawbacks. However, the development of ideas remains somewhat limited and repetitive, particularly in the body paragraphs. For instance, the discussion on economic growth mentions GDP, taxes, and doctors, but these points are under-developed and lack extended examples. Furthermore, the length requirement of 250 words is not met, as the response contains only 221 words. This falling short of the minimum length negatively impacts the overall task response and prevents the score from reaching higher bands.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a brief conclusion, showing a clear overall structure. Paragraphing is attempted, although formatting issues like starting the second paragraph with a lowercase letter ('there are several significant advantages') detract from the presentation. Cohesive devices such as 'In addition' and 'On the other hand' are employed to guide the reader through the arguments. However, referencing and logical progression are sometimes mechanical or abrupt, and transitions between sentences can feel disjointed. Overall, the organizational framework is adequate for a Band 6, though cohesion requires smoother integration.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate to communicate basic ideas, featuring terms such as 'economical growth', 'progressive country', and 'traditions'. However, there are numerous lexical and spelling inaccuracies throughout the text, including 'economical' instead of 'economic', 'svera;l researchs', 'engeniers', and 'tarditions'. The student attempts less common vocabulary, but these frequent errors in word choice and spelling demonstrate limitations in precision and control, placing the lexical performance solidly within the Band 5 descriptor range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as 'Although this development has some disadvantages, I believe that its advantages outweigh the drawbacks.' However, grammatical accuracy is weak, with frequent errors occurring in subject-verb agreement and word forms, such as 'It can leads', 'most of the young adults are well doctors', and 'They have lack of spirit'. Punctuation and capitalization errors, such as starting a sentence with a lowercase letter, also occur. These persistent errors occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, aligning the grammar score with Band 5.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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