Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, having a large adult population is a growing trend among countries across the world.

Theasedays, the population of few nation includes a relatively huge number of young human being, contrast with number of senior individuals.

In my opinion, although large young generation is a great assest for country where they can get a numerous oppurtunities for employment and adminstration can utilize young youth in army but having senior people will provide thier experienced to the next generation.

On the one hand, indeed adult can get multiple employment benefit. As they can contribute for a long time as a result, he or she can enhance the economy of nation. Moreover, if a person who is young can give thier live for army therefore, men and women can protect thier nation from terrorist attack.

For instance, according to survery which was conducted by Western Sydney University, it states that 75% of countries experienced that if they have large youth generation they are more powerful in army and employment sector as compared to other nation.

On the other hand, undoubtedly by having old generation in nation is a great path way for new youth. As they can assist the younger individuals with thier experienced. Furthermore, if a male or female want to learn quick for any tough exams or any job consequently, they have to take training from old people who have expertise in the particular field.

For example, Last year, I have crack a compitative exam with a help of senior citizen who has a great experienced in that subject as a result I got 90% in my result.

To sum up, I opion though, having large young people in any nation can give a lot of opportuinty for em[ployment and they can protect their nation by joining in army filed but with a elderly people will be a blessing for new youth as they can get a valuable experienced from senior person as a result, they can become succesful in life as soon as possible.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The candidate addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of having a young population, presenting a clear position in the introduction and conclusion. Ideas are extended, such as the economic contribution of young adults and the knowledge transfer from older generations. However, some arguments are slightly repetitive or under-developed, and the phrasing occasionally lacks precision. For instance, the claim that young people 'can give thier live for army' is a bit extreme and generalized. Overall, the response meets the criteria for Band 6 as it addresses all parts of the task with relevant, albeit somewhat basic, ideas and a clear overarching position.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with clear paragraphing, separating the introduction, body paragraphs on advantages and disadvantages, and the conclusion. However, cohesion is frequently faulty or mechanical. The candidate overuses transitional phrases like 'Moreover,' 'Furthermore,' and 'consequently,' often stringing them together awkwardly, as seen in 'Furthermore, if a male or female want to learn quick... consequently, they have to take training...'. Referencing is also occasionally unclear or repetitive. Paragraphs are logical in their placement, but the mechanical transitions and occasional awkward phrasing place this firmly at Band 5.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The lexical resource is adequate for the task but exhibits noticeable errors and a limited range. The candidate attempts less common vocabulary (e.g., 'adminstration,' 'compitative exam'), but these attempts are marred by spelling and word-choice errors. There are also severe spelling and morphological errors throughout the text, such as 'Theasedays' instead of 'These days,' 'assest' instead of 'asset,' 'oppurtunities' instead of 'opportunities,' and 'survery' instead of 'survey.' While communication is not entirely impeded, these frequent lexical and spelling errors limit the score to a Band 5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The candidate attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing conditional structures ('if a person who is young can give thier live...'). However, grammar and punctuation are plagued by frequent errors. There are frequent issues with subject-verb agreement ('old generation in nation is', 'elderly people will be'), article usage ('the economy of nation'), and tense consistency ('I have crack a compitative exam'). These frequent errors can cause some difficulty for the reader and prevent the grammar score from reaching a higher band, making Band 5 the most accurate descriptor.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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