Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is argued that the number of older people is relatively smaller, compared to the number of young adults in the population of some countries as if right now. I think this situation is very advantageous for any country. Having many young adults means more work force and faster development, but if older people are in the majority then there will be too much pressure on young adults to sustain the older populations need.

Young adults are the heartbeat as well as blood for a country, so without them the country economic will be dead in the future. Young populations are the most crucial factor for development of the country. They are responsible for R&D of new fields and technology and are the fraction which lead the country both politically and economically and if there population is greater then it will decrease the total burden.

For instance, China has a large number of young adults compared to older ones due to which china achieve a historical run and now the bottom country in technology and finance in 19th century is now the leading country in technology likes robotics and artifical intelligence and to second richest country lagging behind the USA and is the top exporter globally and its all due to its enormorus work force full with young adults.

Similarly, If the population of older people is in majority then all the work force will be required to sustain the basic needs of them and this puts a large pressure as well as burden work force because they need to sustain the needs and rival other countries in technology. For example, countries like Japan and South Korea are facing the same problem as there older population is in majority the work force is highly pressured and have gave up on reproduction and the whole country population is affected by it. Although older people are great for educating and providing moral and emotional support but, they cannot tackle the problem that they create.

In conclusion, both the populations is important but having more population that are younger is more suitable for every country. Therefore, I think having younger population in large number is more advantageous.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The student addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of having a large young adult population compared to older people. A clear position is established in the introduction and maintained throughout the essay. Ideas are extended with relevant examples, such as referencing China's economic and technological growth and comparing it with the demographic challenges faced by Japan and South Korea. However, some arguments contain sweeping generalizations, and the factual claim regarding China's economic status in the 19th century contains a historical inaccuracy. Nevertheless, the main task requirements are met effectively, aligning well with the Band 6.5 to 7.0 profile. On balance, the coverage of the prompt and the development of ideas are sufficient for a solid Band 6.5.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay displays a clear logical organization with an introduction, body paragraphs addressing both sides of the issue, and a distinct conclusion. Cohesive devices are used to connect ideas, such as 'Similarly,' 'For example,' and 'In conclusion.' Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct points. However, referencing is occasionally imprecise, such as 'if there population is greater' (their) and 'that they create,' which causes minor disruptions in the flow. Additionally, some transitional phrases feel slightly mechanical. Overall, the arrangement of ideas is coherent, satisfying the criteria for a Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, attempting less common items such as 'work force,' 'R&D,' 'artifical intelligence' (minor spelling error), and 'enormorus' (spelling error). While there are some lexical inaccuracies and collocation issues, such as 'country economic will be dead' and 'gave up on reproduction,' meaning is generally clear and communication is not impeded. The student attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary related to demographics and economics, but spelling slips and occasional awkward phrasing prevent a higher score, placing this firmly at Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at subordination and relative clauses. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including punctuation issues, run-on sentences, missing articles, and confusion between homophones or word forms (e.g., 'if right now,' 'and if there population,' 'china achieve,' 'older population is in majority the work force'). These errors can occasionally cause some difficulty for the reader, though they do not completely obscure the meaning. The presence of these recurrent errors indicates that the grammar profile fits the Band 5.5 to 6.0 range.

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