Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-18
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.
Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Nowadays, the population of some countries consists of a large number of adults as compared to older people. Although, this trend can cause intense employment competition and high government spendings, I strongly believe that the overall benefits, particularly economic growth and lower welfare costs far outweigh the disadvantages.
On the one hand, having a large number of young adults can cause significant challenges for the nation. Firstly, the primary disadvantage is the increase in the competition for employment. A large number of young adults would graduate every year with advanced and demanding skills and would hence, apply for jobs in government sectors. Subsequently, this creates difficulties for everyone to find jobs and would eventually be unfair to the majority of young citizens. In addition to that, the government experiences severe pressure in order to provide superior quality of education, advanced skills and trainings to young adults which becomes a disadvantage for the nation.
On the other hand, the advantages of having youth in a nation can have numerous benefits. Firstly, the young adults are more likely to have better analytical and management skills, as compared to older people, that are essential for the growth of an economy. When these professionals use their demanding skills in the workplace, it eventually benefits the economy of the nation and in this way, they are able to fulfil the huge amounts of funds from the government. Moreover, a nation with a large population of yound people would reply and spend much on healthcare as compared to older people. The money spent on healthcare facilities could be used for other amenities such as, public infrastructure, improved transport servives and modern technology.
In conclusion, while a large proportion of population can cause pressure for the job sector and the government, the advantages clearly outweigh the limitations as a strong economy and reduced healthcare burden can cause lon term benefits for the nation.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response fully addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of a population with a large number of young adults, clearly stating a position that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Ideas are appropriately extended and supported with relevant arguments regarding employment competition, government spending, economic growth, and healthcare costs. While some of the supporting points, such as the claim regarding healthcare spending, could be slightly more refined, the arguments are coherent and logically developed throughout the essay. The writer successfully maintains a clear overview and directly answers the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The essay demonstrates a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. The response is divided into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, two distinct body paragraphs representing opposing views, and a concluding summary. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', 'Firstly', and 'In conclusion' are used to structure the text, though referencing and transitional phrases occasionally feel slightly mechanical or repetitive, such as the repetitive use of 'Firstly'. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate ideas.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The student uses a sufficient range of vocabulary with some flexibility and precision, demonstrating awareness of collocation and less common lexical items such as 'employment competition', 'analytical and management skills', and 'healthcare burden'. There are occasional slight inaccuracies in word choice or phrasing, such as 'high government spendings' (spending is generally uncountable) and 'reply and spend much on healthcare' (likely intended to mean 'rely'). However, the vocabulary is adequate to convey precise meanings without impeding communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The writer employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating relative clauses and conditional structures. There are frequent error-free sentences, demonstrating good control of grammar and punctuation overall. However, a few minor errors persist, such as 'Although, this trend can cause' (unnecessary comma after 'Although'), 'provide superior quality of education' (missing article), and 'lon term benefits' (spelling error). These errors are non-systematic and do not impede communication, placing the response solidly in the Band 7 range for grammatical accuracy.
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