Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

Although this trend has certain advantages it also have some disadvantagesat the present time the growth of few countries includes a relatively large number of young genaration adults compared with the number of older individuals i will discuss the both view in upcoming peregraph

To commence with there will discuss population increasing every day in these compare a number of older person in it main reasion on these light shotage long time light night out main can feel head and also remonance and wife love and these result new baby oucome world i see very high grouth new generation increasing day by day so that these thing will stoge on food cholth house job and other fasilaties on challenging it for instance new young people population of some ountry include a relatively large number adults and compare these old very short death rato increasing on them so what i see they situation outweight watch on these few country such as eurape country young generation large number difference on them

On the other hand these can ask him on they older country large benifit on his he advise on new chilren on it relatively fourthermore due tu situation on that high lavel money invest bussine at your work in persion property older so these main reasion on compaed that theme relevent knowledge or experience share him for example i will see population on these country includes a large number compare of that in addition outweight every country sall and countrol death reation on these uocomming view point

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response attempts to address the prompt regarding the advantages and disadvantages of having a large young adult population, but the ideas are severely underdeveloped and frequently obscure. The writer mentions some points related to food, housing, and older people sharing knowledge, but these arguments lack clear explanation and logical progression. Phrases such as 'i will discuss the both view in upcoming peregraph' show an over-reliance on memorised template openings rather than genuine task engagement. The position on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages is muddled and difficult to follow. Consequently, the response falls short of the requirements for higher band descriptors, demonstrating features characteristic of Band 4.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The overall organisation of the text is weak. Although the writer attempts to use paragraph breaks, the structure within the paragraphs lacks logical progression and clear transitions. Sentences run into one another without punctuation, creating severe run-on issues, such as in the second paragraph where multiple disparate ideas are joined without commas or full stops. Cohesive devices are either missing or misused, making it extremely difficult for the reader to follow the flow of arguments. Referencing is unclear, and pronouns are frequently ambiguous. This level of cohesion aligns closely with Band 4 descriptors.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is extremely basic, repetitive, and restricted. Throughout the essay, there are numerous severe spelling errors and incorrect word choices, such as 'genaration', 'peregraph', 'shotage', 'cholth', 'fasilaties', and 'bussine'. The writer attempts some less common terms like 'remonance', but these are used incorrectly and impede communication. There is a lack of control over word formation and collocations. The range of vocabulary is barely adequate to convey meaning on a very basic level, placing the response firmly in the Band 4 category for lexical resource.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

Grammatical control is extremely weak throughout the text. The response is characterised by a complete absence of standard punctuation, leading to massive run-on sentences that make reading very difficult. There is virtually no control over simple and complex sentence structures, and basic grammatical rules such as subject-verb agreement and tense consistency are frequently ignored (e.g., 'this trend has certain advantages it also have some disadvantagesat'). Errors are pervasive and constantly cause comprehension difficulties for the reader. This performance matches the descriptors for Band 3.5, but is awarded a solid Band 4 given the presence of recognisable sentence attempts.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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