Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

At the present time, some countries have larger number of young adults as compare to the older peoples. From my point-of-view yes, the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages but it can be have much more disadvantages of that situation if they are influenced by wrong group of peoples.

From my side, i would say that young adults are very important for our country's development and economical growth. Young adults can learn new technologies than any other aged group of peoples can't do, they can work non-stop and can't feel unwell beacuse they are fully energetic for earning money for themselfes and for their families. For example, when a young adult try to earn money for themselfe and for their family and their own life-style they are willing to lean any skill and any technology for the sake of work, this could help a country to be economically strong and more developed.

On the other hand, There are some disadvantages of large number of young adults in some countries because now-a-days young adults can be influenced by the social media and influencers and can stop being part of their country's growth, for example there are some kind of peoples in america and other western side countries, just for LGPTQ benifits they transform their real identity from the whole world and become something that could harm our society. If someone is GOD made like this, its an exception but if someone transform themselfes it's a bad example for our society.

In conclution, the large number of young adults in some countries have the advantage of this situation outweigh the disadvantages but it can be more dangerous for those countries who have large number of young people beacuse they don't have their elders to stop them for doing bad things in their lives.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by taking a clear position that the advantages of having a younger population outweigh the disadvantages. Ideas are introduced regarding economic growth and technological adaptability, such as the claim that 'young adults can learn new technologies than any other aged group of peoples can't do'. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. The argument shifts abruptly in the third paragraph to focus on social media and cultural values, presenting a somewhat generalised and tangential example concerning identity and societal norms. While a position is maintained throughout, the support remains underdeveloped, aligning the response with the Band 6 descriptor where relevant ideas are present but lack full expansion and depth.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay displays a logical overall arrangement with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to separate main ideas, such as moving from economic advantages to potential social disadvantages. However, cohesion is frequently faulty and mechanical. The writer relies heavily on basic transition phrases like 'From my side', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclution'. Furthermore, referencing is at times unclear, and pronoun use creates ambiguity, such as 'if they are influenced by wrong group of peoples' where the antecedent is vague. These issues prevent the response from achieving a higher band, placing it firmly at Band 5 due to inaccurate and repetitive cohesive devices.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to communicate basic arguments about economic growth and societal change. However, there is a limited range of vocabulary with noticeable errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'peoples' instead of people, 'beacuse' instead of because, 'themselfes' instead of themselves, and 'conclution' instead of conclusion. Less common lexical items are attempted, such as 'economical growth' (which should be economic growth) and 'identity', but these attempts are often marred by inaccuracy or awkward collocation. The frequent spelling errors and limited flexibility restrict the score to a Band 5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as conditional sentences ('If someone is GOD made like this...') and relative clauses. However, control over grammar and punctuation is weak, with frequent errors that cause some difficulty for the reader. There are numerous punctuation and capitalization errors, run-on sentences, and basic grammatical mistakes, such as 'it can be have much more disadvantages' and 'young adults can learn new technologies than any other aged group of peoples can't do'. These persistent errors and awkward phrasing indicate that the writer struggles to produce error-free complex sentences consistently, fitting the Band 5 descriptor.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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