Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In many part of the world, the population is consisted of large number of young adults. Although, some people consider it negative, I believe the population includes large number of young adults is very beneficial. Not only because they have fresh minds full new innovative ideas and directly contributing to work force of a country which will help in growth of economy but also because

There are multiple benefits asociated with huge number of young adults. Firstly, they are young and full of potential. As their minds are full of new and innovative ideas which is very beneficial for any country If government provides them with lot of opportunities. Take an example of USA, in early 90's the population of the country is mostly consist of young adults which helps to boom in every industry of the country. Thus, large number of young individuals are indeed beneficial.

Secondly, young individulas can directly take part in the boom of the economy of the country by being part of the work force. As young individual can work more hours and difficult jobs and create income which will directly add to the GDP of the country. For example, in 1877 , China's mostly population was consisted on old people which becomes one the reasons in the colapse of the economy of China. Hence, the large numbers of young population is very important and beneficial.

To sumup, I believe that young adults are the back bone of any country because they are directly contributing in the success of the country in many aspects by putting in there physical strength and fresh minds with alot of new and innovative ideas.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing the advantages and disadvantages of having a large young adult population, maintaining a clear position throughout. Ideas are introduced and supported with examples, such as the references to the USA and China, though some historical claims are factually inaccurate or generalised. The main body paragraphs explore the benefits of innovation and economic contribution adequately. However, the introduction is cut off abruptly in the middle of a sentence, which disrupts the initial development of the ideas. Despite this, the core task is sufficiently covered, aligning well with the Band 6 descriptors where all parts are addressed, though some ideas lack full depth and accuracy.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay displays a generally coherent overall arrangement with a clear paragraph structure separating the introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'Firstly,' 'Secondly,' and 'To sum up' are used to guide the reader through the points. However, referencing and transitions are sometimes mechanical or faulty, as seen in the incomplete introductory sentence that ends abruptly and fails to connect smoothly to the first body paragraph. Furthermore, some sentences within the paragraphs are overly repetitive in structure. Overall, the organizational structure is visible and logical enough to meet the criteria for a Band 6.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'innovative,' 'potential,' 'work force,' and 'back bone.' However, there are noticeable errors in word choice, collocation, and phrasing throughout the text. Examples include 'In many part of the world,' 'population is consisted of,' 'asociated,' and 'mostly population was consisted on.' These lexical inaccuracies and non-standard word forms occur frequently. While communication is not severely impeded, the density of these errors prevents the vocabulary score from reaching higher bands, making a Band 5.5 the most appropriate evaluation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and conditional structures. However, grammatical accuracy is weak, featuring frequent errors such as passive voice misuse ('is consisted of', 'was consisted on'), missing articles ('to work force', 'boom in every industry'), and subject-verb agreement issues. Punctuation is also problematic, evidenced by the incomplete sentence fragment left hanging in the introduction. Because the errors are frequent and occasionally cause strain for the reader, particularly when combined with awkward phrasing, the writing falls into the Band 5 category where frequent errors persist.

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